Isolation
by blizzard11
Summary: (LAST CHAPTER UP!) You were lost and I found you. Little did I know that you were destined to capture my soul. (ToFuu pairing) R&R please!
1. Silence

Isolation [Rough draft started January 29, 2002 - 8:06 am]  
  
**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.**  
  
**A/N:** Okay…so I revamped this whole fic AGAIN for like, the 2nd time in history. Oh well. Anyway, I'm condensing the chapters. Uh...this is the original chapters 1 and 2. It's going to be a bit confusing but I decided to do this because I have some other things in mind for the next chapters. K? Oh yeah...Tokiya seems a bit OOC, ne? Well, it's all due to his miraculous summer vacation and a priest who managed to change a bit of him. Let's just say that he's on his way to self-recovery. I'm writing a side fic [Tokiya POV] on that. Let me finish this particular fic first.  
  
R and R please! Thanks a lot!  
  
**Chapter 1: Silence and revelation  
**  
::Why am I here?  
  
To be with you, right?  
  
If so…where are you now?  
  
You're gone.  
  
You left me.  
  
I can't believe…  
  
…you'd do such a thing.  
  
After all, you did promise me something.  
  
That was a future together.  
  
Where is it now?::  
  
All it took were 2 sentences. It was over. There was nothing she could do about it anymore. It was over. No tears, no pleading, no weeping could ever take the pain away. Something hit her right through the chest and brought forth some unknown aching. This was all so new to her.  
  
"We're very sorry, Kirisawa-san."  
  
::No. It couldn't be.::  
  
"We've lost him."  
  
::No... I did. I lost him. You did your job. I failed. Within 2 hours, I just lost the most important person in my whole life. He's gone now. I have no idea as on how to get him back here. Just…tell me it's all a lie. Tell me it's a big lie.::  
  
They tried to offer her reassurance and condolences, however...she was still drowning amidst shock. She was trying to accept the truth and brush it away at the same time. Finally, her courage and strength gave up. She started to cry. Sadness moved her to tears.  
  
::I'm lost now. I can't find you.::  
  
Immediately, arms wrapped around her, seeking to comfort her. She hastily moved away. Even though everyone she knew was there, standing by her side, she felt alone. Cold, bitter, scared and alone. She gazed up at her best friend and mouthed  
  
::I'm sorry. Just leave me alone.::  
  
Her words were heeded. She was left alone. In the dark room, binding her with her own sadness. The same dark room where he left this world to pass on to the next. She gripped the chair, signaling her tension and anxiety. Colorless liquid flowed freely from her eyes once more and she broke down.  
  
For the first time in her life, Fuuko Kirisawa had no idea about what to do except cry and seek comfort within the 4 walls of the hospital room.  
  
****************  
  
::3:45 pm. The sun shall set and I shall bask in the fiery glory all by myself::  
  
It took her one slam to finish jamming all of her books into the locker. It was indeed one stressful day at school. Fuuko felt tired, and all the energy seemed to escape from her body just like the air when a balloon is popped. She was always tired, for some unknown reason. Tired from school, from problems at home, from all the anxiety...  
  
Just like everyday. She didn't know what was happening to her.  
  
"Fuuko-chan! Fuuko-chan!"  
  
A perky voice filled her ears temporarily. She recognized it faintly. Her thoughts were cut short and she whirled around, wondering who would be calling her name at this time of the day. Surely, everyone had gone home by now? Fuuko checked her watch and her eyes hazily focused on the slender girl with long brown hair walking ---no, running towards her.  
  
"Fuuko-chan, I've been looking all over for you!" Yanagi said breathlessly. Then, latching her arm with Fuuko, she dragged her near the exit of the school.  
  
"What? What's going on Yanagi? Where are you taking me?" she asked, jadedly. She had no time for little girlish talks or afternoon snacks. She wanted to sleep. Her body practically craved it most of the time.  
  
::Go away, please..::  
  
"It's a surprise! You're going to love it sooo much. Now, come with me and stop trying to pull back." Yanagi gave her a smile, which Fuuko was indeed forced to return. She had to. She had no choice but to. For Fuuko, life was like that. So unwillingly, she opened her mouth to reveal perfect teeth cast in a nice smile. Something she used to wear.  
  
::How long has it been since I last smiled?::  
  
She was never the same. The minute it happened, the life in her blue eyes left. Her happiness and bubbly spirit went away. It seemed like her soul died along with him. She was empty now. No more energy and laughs. Those were replaced by sullen thoughts and grim frowns. Fuuko refused to go out. She stayed by herself, transforming from a jovial girl, into one morose individual.  
  
And now, she was going with Yanagi to some place she doesn't know about. She hardly knew what the gang was up to nowadays. Actually, she corrected herself; I never bothered to know anymore. She hardly spent time with them. She was too busy, studying or walking by a familiar path, thinking deep thoughts to keep her occupied. She returned to school a few weeks after he died. Almost everyone saw the change. And it started to spread. News that Kirisawa Fuuko, one of the most popular martial artists in school, lost her lover.  
  
Fuuko ignored the sympathy everyone gave her. It was all fake anyway. No one knew how she really felt. Because everyone was happy. They all had someone to share everything with. They didn't know what it was like to have someone wrenched away from you.  
  
::How long has it been since I lost you?::  
  
10 months, to be exact. She wasn't even sure if she was ready to face the world once more. She was convinced that it was a bitter place. There wasn't any warmth for her to dwell in anymore.  
  
::People die. That's the reality of life.::  
  
"Fuuko? Fuuko?" Yanagi was waving her hand across her blue eyes. Fuuko stared at Yanagi's palm for a while until she got dizzy. She brought up her own to stop it.  
  
"Yeah?" She asked, while placing Yanagi's hand down. "I'm getting dizzy, you know."  
  
Yanagi didn't reply but gave her a searching look. Her brown eyes squinted and her expression frowned. It was there for a moment. Then it was gone.  
  
"What?" Fuuko raised her own eyebrows. "Anything wrong?"  
  
The frown faded away quickly. Yanagi shook her head and smiled again. "Nope, it's nothing. You've been really weird for the past months, Fuuko. Are you sick or something?"  
  
::Sick and tired of people's sympathy, yes.::  
  
Her parents did everything they could to help ease the depression growing inside of her. They brought her to some psychologist a few blocks away from her school. Yet, not much help was offered to her. There was little advice. It was more of questioning and she, trying to answer them. It had been the same questions all over and over again...she merely got tired of answering them, replacing the sullen yes with a snappy retort. Yet, for Yanagi she could make some effort to do it nicely.  
  
She smirked inside. "No, Yanagi. I'm fine. You worry too much about me."  
  
::I wish I could smile, the way you do. You seem to be happy about almost everything.::  
  
Yanagi had everything going for her. She had good grades, a wealthy life, and she had Recca by her side. It's been what, 3 years after the whole Mouran episodes, and the two were still going steady. Looks like they had plans of getting hitched or something. Just thinking of the two lovebirds made her want to gag.  
  
"Okay, if you say so." Yanagi looked at her doubtfully before holding her hand and beckoning her to go inside her house. "Let's go in, shall we?"  
  
She followed her without resisting this time. Yanagi probably wanted to have tea with her. Would that mean that she would be asking the same questions all over again? Fuuko rolled her eyes. She wasn't in the mood to explain how she's been over everything and that she was coping with the pain, yadda…yadda. She crossed two fingers behind her back, hoping that this wouldn't be another interrogation. From the guidance counsellor, to her parents and now Yanagi. Looked as if everyone wanted to pry into her.  
  
Yanagi opened the door. Fuuko hesitated to enter for a moment, then stepped right in. This was the same house where she'd run to whenever she'd have problems. Fuuko inhaled the jasmine-scented air and thought faintly of times when she'd run into this house and seek the comfort of Yanagi and her soothing voice. Times when she and Yanagi would simply snack on a few titbits watch a few television shows and eventually fall asleep on each other. Most of the time was spent on gossip.  
  
::Come to think of it, I haven't done that in a long time.::  
  
She walked inside the dark house. Yanagi seemed to have disappeared. "Yanagi?" Fuuko called out cautiously. She started to drift away again in her own thoughts not long before...  
  
"Surprise!" A multitude of voices shouted. Fuuko jumped up, a few feet from where she was standing. A dozen lights flicked on and plenty of cracks with rainbow colored balloons. She gaped at her surroundings, wondering what the hell could possibly be going on.  
  
And then, she saw them standing in front of her. Recca, Domon, Yanagi, Kaoru and Ganko. All of them were smiling at her, holding presents and behind them was a big birthday cake.  
  
::I totally forgot.::  
  
"Happy Birthday Fuuko!" Recca approached her and gave her a warm hug. She could only stand still, surprised. When he stepped back, she blinked, still speechless. They stood there for a while, looking a bit awkward and waiting for her reaction.  
  
She forced herself to say something. "Mou, Arigatou gozaimasu minna. I really appreciate this. I forgot the occasion." She smiled, sheepishly.  
  
"Well, that's why we're here for you Fuuko.." Yanagi too, walked towards her and squeezed her arm gently. "It's been a long time since you were with us for occasions like this. We decided to make this extra special, just for you."  
  
::Has it been that long?::  
  
"Yep, talk about long! It's been 9 damn months since I got to see my dear Fuuko-chan in her smiles and laughter." Domon chipped in. "So, Fuuko...since it's been _that_ long, would you mind giving me a kiss? I mean, you haven't been doing that for quite some time so you can practice with me, ne? ne?" he asked hopefully.  
  
Domon. He was still the same. Waiting for her. Some things would never change.  
  
::Kiss? Our first kiss...::  
  
She recalled vaguely the small room filled with the rays of sunset, a pair of arms that caught her when she fell for him...and warm lips touching her own. The memory was too much for her to bear.  
  
"I'm sorry Domon, but I don't think that would be appropriate." She replied coldly.  
  
The earth master halted, sensing the change in her mood. "Fuuko?"  
  
She straightened up once more. "I think it was highly insensitive of you to say that. You very well know that I'm not in love with you or anybody else for that matter."  
  
How dare he, anyway. Fooling around and kidding like that when he already knew--  
  
"Fuuko...I was only kidding." Domon stammered, seeing her face.  
  
"Well, you're joke wasn't very nice at all!" She burst out. "I permitted only one person to kiss me during my birthday and now he's..." she trailed off.  
  
Yanagi winced slightly. She knew how much her friend was still very touchy about the subject. Domon had obviously touched a nerve and it wasn't turning out to be very pretty. She immediately hurried to the rescue of the ring-wielder and to pacify her friend.  
  
"Fuuko-chan," she said gently, laying a hand on Fuuko's arm. "Domon didn't mean to upset you. He was only joking, and besides…you never seemed to mind before. You should try lightening up. After all, it is your birthday and we only want you to be happy."  
  
She was getting annoyed for some reason she couldn't define.  
  
::Me? Happy? Since when did you know about real happiness?::  
  
"I didn't mind before because it was the past! Now is different." she half- yelled. "To tell you the truth, I'm not into parties or special celebrations anymore. I'm not HAPPY. I was planning to walk alone by myself and enjoy the solitude. But since you guys prepared such a _wonderful_ party, without even considering whether I was in the mood for it..."  
  
"But Fuuko, be reasonable. That _was_ the past. Don't you think it's time to move on? You should have fun every once in a while. Brooding to yourself doesn't do you any good at all. It hurts me to see you like that by yourself."  
  
::The only comfort I manage to find is when I'm alone.::  
  
She felt Yanagi's hand remove its hold on her arm. She saw her trembling, placing a hand over her mouth, looking ready to break down. Fuuko saw it and realized...  
  
Big mistake – she had said it out loud. She could see it. Her best friend was about to cry. Recca flew to Yanagi's side and cast her a hurt look that said 'how could you?'.  
  
"Yanagi.." she started, then stopped, seeing the young healer in tears.  
  
::I'm sorry. But I really can't be myself anymore. I don't deserve to be here.::  
  
She turned around and fled from the awful scene. As if knifes could cut through hearts, then this particular memory inflicted her with enough pain to end her sanity. ::I'm sorry, but I can't be myself anymore.::  
  
Fuuko ran out of the house in full speed, tears spilling down her cheeks. Her mind filled with all sorts of thoughts, including resentment towards the group and bouts of reprimanding for her. She surprised herself back there. She didn't know she had the capability to explode like that.  
  
::Well, it's not as if I haven't expressed my feelings like that for the longest time.::  
  
She didn't care where she was going. All she knew was that she had just ran from her own birthday celebration, insulted her very own friends and was now feeling very confused. That's all she felt. Confusion. Who would save her now and comfort her?  
  
::I miss you.::  
  
She didn't pay attention to where she was heading. As a result, she crashed into someone and fell down straight on the cement. She hit it hard and felt her arm scratch the rough pavement. She lowered her head as to not show her face scrunched up in pain. It hurt.  
  
"Gomen ne. Daijoubu desu.." A familiar male voice called out to her, in concern. "Are you alright ---Fuuko??"  
  
He knew her. A hand, outstretched reached out to her and pulled her up. Fuuko forced herself to look at the face of this man.  
  
::Could it be you?::  
  
She recalled memories of him pulling her up whenever she fell down. Asking if she was okay, hurt or whatever. A voice filled with concern. Maybe it was heaven after all. Her angel was there to rescue her and make sure everything was fine.  
  
::Finally, you've come back to me...::  
  
"Fuuko? Fuuko?" Strong and slender arms shook her to bring her back to reality. She opened her eyes and felt her arm sting. Nope. This wasn't heaven yet. In heaven, you don't feel any pain. Nor sadness. She was still hurting.  
  
Fuuko still hoped that it would be him. So, with enough effort, she opened her eyes and stared at the face  
  
Of Tokiya Mikagami.  
  
Fuuko groaned. She couldn't decipher whether it was from the prospect of her injury or at the sight of him. Or maybe both.  
  
Only silly girls would actually hope for the dead to come back to life, she scolded herself mentally.  
  
"I was wondering whether you fainted."  
  
She tried to stand up. "No, of course not. Why would I? I'm not that delicate you know." She said while attempting to do so. He assisted her with one hand. She took it and hoisted herself up to her feet.  
  
::What are you doing here?::  
  
By chance, he was also wondering the same thing. He recognized the purple hair and the blue eyes. Still, why would this girl be running around like a maniac (who wasn't even looking where she was going, he added mentally) and had tears streaming down her face? It wasn't in his nature to be nosing around yet curiosity killed him, and he couldn't wait for an explanation.  
  
He seized the chance to ask her. "So, where were you going?"  
  
She looked up and looked at him inquisitively. It took her a few seconds before she came up with an answer. "Basically, nowhere. Anywhere. Just to get out of here," she replied. "What about you? What brings you in this neighborhood? Unless you were on your way..."  
  
Weird, he stated quietly. "I was on my way to Yanagi's house when I bumped into you. In fact she was saying something about---"  
  
"My birthday." She finished irritably. "Yes, I know it's my birthday, there's a party and everything and I just finished enjoying the formalities."  
  
"Okay..." Tokiya raised an eyebrow.  
  
He was quite taken aback. He did know Fuuko very well for her sharp tongue but she never answered him in a tone like this. Perhaps she was in a bad mood, he thought. But then again, people during birthdays wouldn't be in such a foul state unless...  
  
"You had a fight with them."  
  
She looked at him defiantly, then sighed and lowered her head again. "Yes, maybe. I don't know..."  
  
A touch of uncertainty told him enough.  
  
"Are you alright?" came the next inquiry.  
  
::I am so sick and tired of hearing that same question.::  
  
"Mikagami, had I known that you took a course on psychology, then I wouldn't be surprised to be answering all these questions of yours."  
  
Mikagami wasn't Yanagi. Like the others, he deserved nothing but a sharp reply from her.  
  
"As a matter of fact, Fuuko...I've taken into being more of a team mate who respects you. I was invited to the party, so I might as well go along with everything else." He said, raising another eyebrow and crossing his arms.  
  
"No one forced you to go, you know."  
  
Somehow, he didn't like the way the conversation was going. He gave Fuuko a scrutinizing look before stating something else.  
  
"Your arm." He pointed out.  
  
"My what?"  
  
"Your arm." He repeated. "It's bleeding."  
  
Fuuko glanced at her right arm and saw that it had been grazed. It stung again. This time, she couldn't hide it. "It's okay...just a little scratch." She said nonchalantly. It's not as if it was something she could not handle.  
  
Tokiya took out his handkerchief. "No, I don't think so. Here," he handed it to her. "Wrap it around so that it won't get infected. We can ask Yanagi for some ointment or better yet, she could heal it..."  
  
"No!" she blurted out suddenly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I don't...I don't want to go in there. They're probably mad at me right now."  
  
"I don't understand..."  
  
"Look, can we just not go in there? Besides, I'm fine already, see? It's only a small scrape and it's nothing I can't handle." She cut him off pretty quickly. "I'm really sorry but I'm very irritated at his moment. I need to be alone for a few seconds so if you don't mind, I had better be off now."  
  
He smirked. Somehow, he saw a resemblance of himself within Fuuko. Only that she was more willing to voice it out more than he did. Still, she was as hard-headed as ever.  
  
Tokiya inwardly rolled his eyes. He sighed loudly. "You are so stubborn. Still, if that's the way you want it to be, so be it. I'm in no position to stop you anyway. Happy Birthday Fuuko." He said, before finally turning on his heel and walking away from her.  
  
::Good day to you too, Mr. Know-it-all.::  
  
"Matte, your hanky!" she called after him, holding the white cloth.  
  
He shook her off with a wave of his hand. "Just make sure it gets cleaned after you use it. I don't want any of your germs."  
  
"Why you insufferable..." Fuuko growled, and for once, she was tempted to go after Mikagami and punch that inflated head of his. He was still the same, smart-ass everyone knew. She stopped herself just in time. After all, she did owe the guy for his handkerchief and the little help he gave her.  
  
::I will always hate Mikagami::  
  
He was still the same cold guy that he was ever since he joined the gang. Fuuko wondered where she got the patience to put up with him. It's a wonder that she didn't wack the lights out of him. She was too tired to do anything to get revenge. She settled with rolling her eyes and continued to walk down the road to the place she was heading.  
  
*****************  
  
"I see." Tokiya said. "So the baka said something about kisses and she got mad and stormed off?"  
  
Yanagi nodded sadly. "It's my fault, Tokiya-sempai. Maybe I should have asked her whether she wanted to have a celebration or not. She just got so angry at me."  
  
Tokiya nodded. Upon seeing an empty house and a miserable looking cake, he decided to get to the bottom of things. It was not in his nature to meddle with such but he did notice Yanagi near tears. Besides, something was really wrong with Fuuko for her super sharp replies were something new to Tokiya. Not only that...but also her physical state.  
  
At first, the prussian blue orbs were empty. Life was nowhere to be found in those eyes, which used to have so much energy. He also noted, that she had also grown much thinner and carried herself in such a different manner from before.  
  
Seeing the ensui master enter the house, Yanagi nearly threw herself at Tokiya, sobbing hard. Although Tokiya would've comforted her he hesitated because, Recca was already there. Surprisingly, the sea-monkey kept quiet. Probably mad at Fuuko, he thought. And worried about his hime, he added afterwards.  
  
He didn't blame Yanagi. She was only doing her duty as a friend. Now, if Fuuko were someone he didn't know, he would have slashed her neck, knowing that she made Yanagi cry. Anyone who made Yanagi cry would answer to him, if not Recca.  
  
Yet, he couldn't very well blame Fuuko for her reaction to the whole thing. He knew about Raiha's death although he was not physically there at that time. He was abroad, taking a vacation in Europe for a change. Only then did he find out that one of his comrades was in deep pain. Wait a minute, he told himself. Why is he actually studying the whole picture? He had this reputation for being the person who doesn't care about anyone except Yanagi. Then again, Tokiya did experience something while he was away at Rome. Something that changed him to the very core.  
  
He met a very wise priest who taught him about life and death. How the world turns, how to exorcise his demons. Tokiya was a bit reluctant at first to open up, knowing how hard it is to trust someone and remembering the last man who he trusted turned out to be the one who murdered his sister.  
  
And so his 3 weeks of lessons started with the priest, whose name was Fr. Vincent. He opened Tokiya's eyes and managed to squeeze out some of his emotions. It was in the middle of the third week that Tokiya received news on Raiha.  
  
Fr. Vincent told him to take care of the poor girl. Tokiya merely smirked in reply and said that the girl can probably take care of herself. Besides, she has other friends who would do a better job than he would.  
  
No, his adviser told him. You're the best man for the job. You know what it's like to lose a loved one. They don't. She will need you at a time like this.  
  
Tokiya did not pay attention to those words until now. When he came back to Japan, he didn't see any trace of Fuuko. He didn't bother. Where was she anyway? He only saw her now.  
  
Actually, he admitted, I've seen her a couple of times around the campus. She looked fine to him. He didn't see any change, any symptoms of severe depression. But maybe that was because he didn't look hard enough.  
  
Nor did he spend time with her. Tokiya bit his lip as a small wave of guilt went over him.  
  
Tokiya finished speaking with Yanagi, assuring her that he would talk to Fuuko and help her. He set foot outside and began his walk towards his house, which was a 15-minute walk from Yanagi's place.  
  
Now Tokiya, his mind asked him, why have you decided to do this? He shook his head. It was for Yanagi. Period. That was all there was to it anyway. He promised he'd try. From what they've told him, he was the only one Fuuko didn't snap at.  
  
Then again, he was the one late for the party. Something in his heart told him to give it a try. It wouldn't hurt, would it?  
  
"Hey, Mifuyu...what would you do if you were at my place?"


	2. Finding You

Isolation  
  
**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.  
**  
**A/N:** Here we go...the original parts 3 and 4 are in here. ^-^ Like I said, I'm making way for some other plans I have in mind. BTW, people have asked me about the ToFuu relationship here...ah well, it's going to seem like it's this brother-sister thingy...but that will change. I have to change Iceman's hormones first. ^^;;  
  
**Part 2: Finding you  
**  
::A lazy afternoon…  
  
The hazy sunset.  
  
Two lovers, hand in hand…  
  
Just you and me.::  
  
Fuuko sat on the lonesome swing and started to rock herself gently, watching the sun sink and take its place by the city. She cradled her right arm, which still was bleeding. It still hurt, yes but she didn't want to use Mikagami's piece of cloth. For one, it would be stained ...it looked so damn expensive.  
  
::It was about time I took care of myself anyway::  
  
She closed her eyes, feeling the wind brush through her hair gently. Softly, as if it were whispering songs to her. Fuuko found comfort in this quiet place where she used to go as a child whenever she felt lonely and sad. She took a liking to swings, finding them relaxing to sit in. She let the wind take her away for a minute.  
  
Fuuko loved air. It was her favorite element after all. And her key element, she reminded herself. Maybe that's why she and the fuujin were destined to be with each other.  
  
"Just the same with you and I..." she mumbled softly.  
  
Thunder and wind. Destined to fight. Destined to be with each other. Both causing a storm. His first words to her. They were destined to fight each other.  
  
::How I miss you so::  
  
She sighed softly, another tear trickling down her face made its way down her lap. She was used to crying. Alone. Not in front of people. That's why she had to run out. She was afraid to face them. Why?  
  
::They'd misjudge me::  
  
Right. Rejection was something Fuuko feared to the core. They thought that everything would be easy after 10 months. It wasn't. It isn't easy letting go of someone. Not for her, at the very least. She wondered if anyone would get the message.  
  
"I knew it was you."  
  
Fuuko jumped up from the swing and tripped. She fell straight into the grass and her arm wasn't spared at all. She groaned and rolled over to see who her attacker would be, as she balled her fists and got ready to punch the idiot who nearly scared her out of her wits.  
  
Unfortunately, the 'idiot' grabbed her fist in time. Fuuko, startled, looked at the person, overshadowed by the tree. She opened her mouth in wonder. Long hair and a lean frame. Tall and silent.  
  
::Is it you?::  
  
The hand let go of her's and he stepped forward. Fuuko stared into the man's eyes, hoping it would be a dark shade to confirm her wish...  
  
but they were ice blue.  
  
::Blue?!::  
  
Fuuko stepped back as he stepped forward. The hair was not dark violet but silver-gray. Wrong again Fuuko, she told herself and found Tokiya looking at her in a weird manner, as his hand came up and he quickly tied his long tresses in the same old-fashioned ponytail she had seen him wear countless times.  
  
"What? Don't give me that look, Kirisawa." He explained, after tying the last knot, securing his silver-gray mane. "I didn't mean to scare you."  
  
"You're an idiot!" Fuuko yelled at him, also furiously embarrassed and angry with herself for thinking that he was Raiha for the _second_ time in history.  
  
::Bakaaa~ Fuuko::  
  
"Gee, I always wondered if and when someone would have the courage to tell me that." Tokiya replied. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you or anything." He repeated.  
  
"What were you trying to do?! And why was your hair actually down? Are you trying to fool me into thinking that you're Raiha so that I would stop crying and acting like some weepy girl?"  
  
Upon hearing the answer, Tokiya started doubting his motives once more. Why did he ever put up with unreasonable women? "Fuuko, where the hell did you get the idea that I'm trying to look like Raiha? For one thing, when you jumped off that swing, it hit me therefore pushing me against the tree. My ponytail came off, okay?" he stated in a very impatient tone. How could she mistake him for Raiha when he was nowhere near to looking like that man?  
  
She glared at him. She hated this. Why did he have to come and ruin her moment alone with herself?  
  
"Kirisawa, your arm. How come it isn't bandaged properly yet?" He inquired, taking noticed of the nasty cut that had formed on the girl's forearm and elbow.  
  
"The cut is partly your fault because you scared me. I fell on the ground, remember?" she retorted, trying to avoid the subject.  
  
"Yeah, well that wouldn't have gotten worse if you covered it up." He replied. "Stop arguing with me. You're going to lose this one." He told her firmly. He picked up the white hanky on the ground and held her arm up with his other hand.  
  
"I'm okay, I can take care of myself." She protested.  
  
"Stop insisting that you can, Fuuko." He warned her. Quickly, Tokiya wrapped the wound with the cloth in his hand. He fixed it slightly and knotted it in place. "There." He said. "If you didn't know how to do it, you could've asked me when I bumped into you earlier."  
  
Fuuko yanked her arm away from him. "I know how to do it. I don't need you to act like a know-it-all to show me."  
  
Tokiya rolled his eyes. "Kirisawa, I really don't know what's getting into you these days. All I did was try to help you..." He trailed off. Fuuko sat on the swing once more and he saw tears were falling down again. She continued to push herself, a bit faster this time.  
  
Okay...so maybe he was being a bit too aggressive. He approached her. "Fuuko..."  
  
She shook her head violently. "Please leave me alone now." A quiet voice told him sorrowfully.  
  
No. He had already made his mind about the situation. He placed a slender hand on her shoulders to stop her from swinging. This time, he said firmly, I've made up my mind. I'm not doing this only for Yanagi, but also for you. You need help.  
  
::I said go away.::  
  
"Didn't you hear me?" Fuuko asked him coldly. "I said I can deal with this by myself Mikagami. I don't need you and your sympathy."  
  
She had had enough of this whole mess, anyway.  
  
"I don't think you've been doing fine by yourself Fuuko. It's affecting everything in your life." He said quietly. "You need people to help you with this."  
  
"And you think you could make everything right?" she stood up immediately from the swing and faced him daringly. "You're one of them. All of you are the same! You all pity me...you never give me a chance to be by myself! Don't you know that I find comfort in being alone, Tokiya?!"  
  
"Fuuko, I don't pity you."  
  
"Then what are you trying to prove to me? That I'm weak? Oh, so now you can gloat about Fuuko, the poor girl... You don't know anything about what's going on inside me. Yanagi, Recca, that idiot Domon...you all think it's easy losing someone you've loved for 2 years.." her eyes blazed with wretchedness and anger.  
  
Tokiya grabbed her shoulders. "Listen to me!" he said sternly, his blue eyes flashing, too, for a split-second. "I KNOW what it's like to lose someone you love and is close to your heart. I've loved her for my whole life and I lost her in one instant."  
  
"Loving someone and losing them hurts, I know that. I've had 17+ years to figure that out and I never did until this summer. I didn't do it on my own, Fuuko. Someone helped me. It is HARD. But it's harder when you're all by yourself. And I can prove it to you because I've learnt it the hard way."  
  
Pools of dark blue versus shards of ice. She continued glaring at him.  
  
"Don't you see?" he continued "You're acting the very same way I did when I lost Mifuyu. All of your friends are reaching out to you but you've built a wall around yourself so high that anyone who tried to climb it ends up falling down and gets hurt. I don't want you to end up like me, who had to suffer for 18 years..."  
  
::Mikagami.::  
  
Fuuko stared at Tokiya for a while, a bit surprised at what he told her. Him? Actually admitting his true feelings to her? This was too good to be true.  
  
::Boy, Mi-chan...you have changed.::  
  
It still wasn't helping her.  
  
"So I guess Rome helped you, huh? Then maybe I should go there too and see what it's like. Maybe it could help me with my problems." She said dryly. "Listen Tokiya, I don't have time for this crap right now. I know what you're trying to do. You're aiming to be a counselor and everything."  
  
"Fuuko...were you actually listening to what I said?"  
  
"And to make things worse, I know you're not doing this for me or anything else...you're doing this to gain plus points in front of Yanagi! Like what's the deal Mikagami?"  
  
Her eyes pierced his. ::I'm not learning anything from you.::  
  
Tokiya's eyes widened when he heard her mention Yanagi's name. What IS wrong with her? He thought irritably, closing his eyelids. I'm not doing this only for Yanagi. I'm doing this for YOU too.  
  
"Fuuko, it's not for Yanagi. That hurt you know." He said quietly.  
  
::Well, you're not the only one who's hurt here.::  
  
"Tell me this, Tokiya." She asked him, "Why the heck are you bothering yourself with me? I mean, if it's definitely not for Yanagi, which I am beginning to believe is TRUE, then what is it for? What's in it for you? Because I truly believe that Mikagami Tokiya would NEVER help anyone unless it had something good for him or for his dead sister."  
  
Ouch Fuuko, his eyes said. Have I grown a reputation as far-fetched as that? He asked himself. Boy Mikagami, you still have work to do and some stuff to improve, he told himself. Still, his main goal was to help Fuuko. And he probably isn't going to stop trying until he succeeds. Not until she's okay.  
  
Wait a minute, why the heck is he doing this anyway?  
  
Tokiya heaved a big sigh and opened his mouth to answer the girl, only to find that there wasn't anyone in front of him anymore. Fuuko was gone.  
  
"Damnit."  
  
************  
  
Tokiya arrived at his apartment and closed the door behind him gently. He was tired, dead tired. It was one hectic day for him. The start of the morning wasn't pleasant. He was greeted by 2 professors, asking him about the contest he was about to join that day, making sure if he studied, blah blah blah. Tokiya wished he could snap his fingers and let them disappear for just one minute and leave him in peace.  
  
For the first time in history, he didn't study the night before. Still, it was no miracle that he survived the day and managed to bag 2 gold medals. He had enough knowledge stored in his mind. What made it so difficult was the fact that he was near to being trampled over by a dozen females, who wanted a piece of him. Tokiya growled, put on a nasty expression, even to the point that he snapped at a few people yet those girls would never give up.  
  
If it were not for Mifuyu's constant lessons on respecting women, he would have had those bimbos on the floor with his ensui.  
  
Even though his attitude changed, he was still the number one guy in his school. Girls longed for him, guys envied him... Nothing failed to make the female population swoon and sigh in front of him. It was disgusting and he felt like escaping to the moon at times like that. Who invented girls with 2 digit IQs anyway?  
  
Tokiya exhaled loudly, closed his eyes and slumped on his couch. He came near to falling asleep as his muscles relaxed against the soft cushions. The morning was nothing compared to what happened in the afternoon. Keeping him more perplexed was Fuuko. After trying to talk some sense into her (his first attempt) she immediately insulted him –no, she actually accused him of doing a secret mission for Yanagi. How could she? Tokiya frowned. He was trying to help, and sincerely. Who brought Yanagi in the subject?  
  
Of course, secretly, he was indeed helping Yanagi. But the main purpose was to help Fuuko. It was out of a request from Yanagi, his sister and that priest from Europe.  
  
"Mataku..." Tokiya sighed. He wasn't even 100% sure why he was bothering to help her anyway. His old, icy demeanor would have caused him not to give a damn on anything that happens in her life. He would have left her alone, or even slash her into pieces if he had heard her talk to him about that issue with Yanagi.  
  
But he was different now. He was well on his way to recovering from the wounds of the past. He decided a few months ago that he was fed up being such problematic person. He didn't want to waste his life any longer. This is what probably drove him into trying to help his former teammate. Like he stated a few hours ago, he didn't want her to experience the hardships he had. But she refused to let him help her.  
  
Now he knew what the others felt like when they were trying to talk to him too. He regretted that badly. Still, things have changed and the tables have turned. Tokiya had this strong feeling that he just had to help or he wouldn't have any peace of mind until he did so.  
  
He had this gut feeling that it was his oneesan bugging him.  
  
"Ring…ring…"  
  
His thoughts were cut short when his phone rang. He opened his eyes and his arm stretched lazily to pick up the extension lying on the table next to him. "Moshi, moshi. This is Mikagami speaking."  
  
"Tokiya-senpai?"  
  
Yanagi? It sounded like her. Why would she call me right now? He asked himself.  
  
"Tokiya-senpai?" The voice repeated.  
  
It was Yanagi. He confirmed it so and opened his mouth to answer. "Hai Yanagi. What brings you to call me right now? Is everything okay?"  
  
"Ahh, yeah...everything is fine. However, I was wondering, if I could see you tomorrow. I need to talk to you. Would it be alright?"  
  
Tomorrow is a Saturday, he thought. But why would she want to talk to him? "Sure. I don't have anything to do anyway. Where would you like to meet?" he inquire politely.  
  
"I was thinking of the new coffee shop that opened in downtown. Would 10 am be fine with you?"  
  
"Hai. I'll be there." He promised.  
  
"Arigatou Tokiya-senpai." he heard her say gratefully. "I'll see you tomorrow then. Good night!"  
  
"Good night." And he hung up too.  
  
That was weird, he concluded. Out of the blue, Yanagi calls him up. She would never have called him unless it would have something to do with Fuuko.  
  
Fuuko again. Suddenly, she became the center of everything and the main root of his problematic state of mind right now. He felt tired of thinking. He didn't have to do this...but like the previous inner debates he's had...He glanced at the clock. 10 pm. It was still early but he decided to go to bed. Fatigue was about to swallow him any minute now. Mindlessly, Tokiya entered his bedroom and fell on the mattress. Before he knew it, he was asleep…basking on the dreams heaven granted him.  
  
***********  
  
::Blood. Red liquid. The source of human life.  
  
I want to see it pour down  
  
And drown me and my sadness  
  
For eternity::  
  
It was cold, and it was raining. What a dreary day, he thought as he walked briskly down the streets, heading to the place where he and Yanagi decided to meet. It was a good thing he brought an umbrella with him. It was a last minute thought as he stepped outside his apartment and saw the sky looking so miserably gloomy.  
  
In less than 15 minutes, he was standing in front of the coffee shop. Before going in, he scanned the place and saw Yanagi sitting by one of the tables by the windows. He went in, shaking the wetness from his legs and arms.  
  
She looked up as he approached her. "Ohayo, Tokiya-senpai" she smiled and stood up to greet him.  
  
He returned the greeting with a slightly smaller smile. "Ohayo Yanagi-san." He removed his jacket and placed it by his umbrella as he proceeded to sit opposite of the young girl. He turned towards her and placed his arms on the table, lacing his fingers together.  
  
"So, what brings us here?" he asked, getting straight to the point.  
  
"Yes." She nodded, "But before that, I ordered coffee for both of us. I hope you don't mind if I took the liberty of doing so. I got the regular, just to be sure." She stated.  
  
Tokiya nodded. "I don't mind. In fact, I appreciate it."  
  
"I should be the one to thank you, Tokiya because you came here. I'm very sorry if I called you late at night just to ask you to stop by here..." She hastily apologized.  
  
He waved it away with his hand. "It's alright. Don't worry about it. So what are we talking about anyway?"  
  
Yanagi bowed her head slightly. "It's about Fuuko."  
  
He knew it was coming. He leaned forward. "Okay. What about Fuuko?"  
  
"I know you've noticed how cold she's been acting. I mean, you must have because you did go after her yesterday. I don't know what to do about it anymore." Yanagi sighed sadly. "She's always moody, she's drifting away more frequently. She even ignores us most of the time. Come to think of it, it seems like she's forever avoiding us for no possible reason. We've only done so much to comfort her about Raiha's death yet she turns away from us. I really have no idea Tokiya-kun on what to do with her. She's built these walls around her...and it is so hard for all of us. It hurts too, because I never expected that she'd be like this. All we want is.."  
  
He nodded. "I know. I tried to talk to her yesterday but all she did was lash back at me." He shook his head slowly. Tokiya studied her pale face, which reflected sadness so deep that he resolved to help her out. No matter what happens.  
  
Yanagi continued. "It's really sad. She's my friend, and I hate seeing her like that. She doesn't even want to talk to me right now. I tried calling her up last night before I tried to call you, but all I got was her answering machine saying that she wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone at the moment."  
  
Tokiya could see tears brimming in her eyes. "Yanagi," he said slowly, while handing her his handkerchief. "Fuuko's undergoing a lot of trouble and pressure right now. As I see it, she's still not yet ready to open up just to anyone. Now I know you're her good friend but even best friends need time off each other. I know, because I guess you've seen me act that way since you met me."  
  
"But Tokiya, you've changed already. I can see it in you." Yanagi said, her eyes lighting up for a bit and she held his hand. He nearly withdrew it, but relaxed after a few seconds. It's been a long time since anyone held his hand. He was again reminded of Mifuyu, through Yanagi's kindness.  
  
"I've had 18 years to do so," he reminded her. "It's only been 10 months for Fuuko, so I wouldn't expect too much judging from what happened yesterday. You should probably give her time. She has been through a lot. I know it wasn't right for her to treat you that way…but you've got to see that she's been hurt terribly. It takes time for wounds like that to heal."  
  
At that moment, 2 steaming cups of coffee were placed in the middle of the table. Yanagi took one and inhaled the aroma coming from the brown mixture. "What scares me most is that she might do something to herself. I don't want anything to happen to her."  
  
Tokiya sipped the coffee. "I don't think so. I suppose she's more sensible than that. Besides," he placed his cup down. "I'm here to help, right?"  
  
She nodded. "Yes, and I'm so grateful that you'll try to talk to her. No one in our group has been successful."  
  
"Well, she got mad at me yesterday." He informed her.  
  
"Oh dear." Yanagi sighed. "Demo, I'm still glad that you're willing to try. Thank you. I owe so much to you, Tokiya."  
  
"It's nothing Yanagi. I think I'm also doing this as a favor to my sister." Tokiya's eyes closed for a moment. "And I really don't want Fuuko to have a hard time like I did. I know what it was like and it wasn't very pleasant. Somehow… I've got to make her see that."  
  
"That's wonderful Tokiya." Yanagi squeezed his hand gently, then raised her cup to drink from it. "I'm just wishing that..." she stared outside the window for a moment and her eyes widened with shock. "Hey...is that...Fuuko?" she asked.  
  
It was raining cats and dogs outside the warm place. Tokiya put his cup down for the second time and took a peek. The window was fogging and it made it hard for him to see anything. Yet there was a figure across the street with no umbrella or protection whatsoever. Tokiya squinted his eyes. He recognized the mop of unruly purple hair. "Yeah, it's her...! What the hell is she doing out there?!"  
  
"We have to get to her, she might be freezing!" Yanagi stood up and made a move to go outside. Tokiya raised his arm to stop her. Just what WAS Fuuko doing out there? He wanted to make sure that it was her.  
  
He continued watching and saw Fuuko raise a small thing, which glinted silver through the mist and place it above her arm. There was no doubting that she wasn't Fuuko. Tokiya stood up abruptly and dashed outside. The rain fell down, swift and cold. There was a small hint of thunder among the skies. Tokiya pushed through the crowd, weaving in and out while muttering hurried excuses, and sprinted across the street.  
  
No. She wouldn't do it. She was smarter and if she did, I'd would kill her. Don't be an idiot Fuuko, he gritted his teeth as he went by cars and through the slippery sidewalk.  
  
"Fuuko! Hey, Fuuko! Don't do it!" he yelled as he came closer, praying hard that she would come to her senses and chuck the blade away.  
  
Fuuko lifted her head and stared at him for a few seconds before she quickly placed the knife down her wrist. Red liquid trickled down her forearm, forming a jagged line. She looked at it like a maniac and simply stood there, under the element that soaked her whole body.  
  
"Fuuko!" Tokiya rushed in front of her and grabbed the knife from her hand. He flung it away, as it hit the ground and shook her shoulders. "Kirisawa, why the hell did you do that to yourself? What the hell are you thinking about?! Hey, look at me!" He stared into her blue eyes, which were empty and dazed.  
  
She gazed at him for a few seconds and whispered something he couldn't hear. Fuuko breathed heavily and closed her eyes.  
  
"Fuuko, no!" Tokiya shook her even harder. The lithe figure he held, fell lifelessly in his arms and he struggled to keep her balanced. Her arm fell limply and blood continued to soak her sleeves and drip on the ground.  
  
No. Do not give up on me, Kirisawa. Fuuko! Wake up, you stupid girl... His mind screamed, while his voice called out her name endlessly, and his arms shaking her body.  
  
::I want to see him...let go of me.::  
  
I won't. You don't deserve to go yet.


	3. Talk to Me

Isolation  
  
**Disclaimer: Flame of Recca and its characters do not belong to me. I'm merely using them for my own pleaser. Please don't sure me. Thanks.  
**  
**A/N:** Phew. I had to review some of the chapters back there. Anyway, this has the original chapters 5 and 6. ^^;; Okay, some people are wondering where the heck is the mush between Tokiya and Fuuko...ah well, we won't get there until the later chapters. I have to let the chemistry work itself out first. BTW, I do feel bad about killing Raiha...but what else would make Fuuko depressed unless the love of her life was taken from her?  
  
R and R please!  
  
**Chapter 3: Talk to me**  
  
_****There was once a young boy gifted with the element fire, who met a young girl who could heal all sorts of wounds and afflictions. The boy was active, lively and would do anything for the girl he met, which he fondly called 'hime'. The girl returned his love and both were content in living. The boy was occasionally challenged by countless enemies and foes, all wanting to get his girl. So the boy enlisted the help of his friends, who also had special powers. One wielded the power of earth, another---a boy, who could control metal. The last 2 were next to him in power. A tall distant man who was bound to water, seeking revenge for his sister's death and a tomboyish girl who was destined with wind, eager to prove herself to the world.  
  
After facing hard battles, the team was successful in beating their main enemy. For now, the boy and girl are living contentedly with each other, both planning for their own home. The man who controlled earth and the boy who lived with metal had their own share of good fortune. The tall distant man went away for a while, unsuccessful in his personal mission. As for the girl who loved wind, she met her own destined partner. ****  
_  
That was their world, until now. Tokiya sighed and leaned back on the chair he was sitting on. Everyone was right, he mused. So many things changed. Plenty of events took place in their lives. He was no longer a tall, distant man...but a calm and peaceful teenager, still facing life as it was given to him bit by bit everyday...and healing slowly.  
  
The tomboyish girl, however, suffered a great fall. He closed his eyes for a few moments and tried to alter his thoughts and looked at the most recent events, which took place.  
  
He had agreed to meet Yanagi that morning in a small place. There, they talked and discussed what they should do about Fuuko and her depression. Things were going well already until Yanagi suddenly spotted their subject, standing outside getting ready to do something with the aid of a Swiss knife. Tokiya immediately dashed to her, running as fast as he used to during the days of the tournament.  
  
He could still remember clearly everything that he saw when he reached Fuuko. Blood, spilling down her arm, lifeless blue eyes looking dazed and confused and a mouth, which opened to whisper unknown words. He heard himself shouting and shaking the girl's limp body, urging her to wake up.  
  
But those eyes didn't open.  
  
He had no choice but to bring her to his apartment with Yanagi. The young healer took care of the gashed wrist in no time, fearing that Fuuko lost a big amount of blood already. She changed the wet clothes on her body and Tokiya lifted her unto his bed. She was still unconscious, but after a while, it seemed as if she was sleeping. Yanagi confirmed this, and Tokiya had to tell her to go home already for healing Fuuko consumed a lot of her energy. Pale and flustered, she protested but Tokiya's firmness sent her back to her place.  
  
He glanced at the glass doors of the balcony. It started raining again. He prayed that Yanagi got home safely and protected from the cold. He lent her one of his jackets and a big umbrella to keep her from getting wet. Still, he couldn't help but worry about her.  
  
And Fuuko. She was still sleeping on his bed, holding the covers near to her and looking like a lost girl. Tokiya stared at her for a few minutes and got up from his position to fix the thick blanket around her. She looked like a really small innocent girl; he smiled and gently placed the covers over her shoulders. Innocent, but stupid enough to earn a scolding from him much, much later. He was about to return to his chair when he felt something grasp his left hand.  
  
She was holding unto his hand, her fingers wrapped around him tightly. His eyes widened and he tried to pull his hand away, thinking that Fuuko must be dreaming of something silly. He tugged carefully, but it only caused her to whimper slightly.  
  
"Don't leave me," she mumbled, burrowing deeper into the mattress and pillows and tightening her grip on his hand. Tokiya stared at her, and then decided to let her hold him. He pulled his chair closer and sat on it. There was no use in pulling his hand away. She wouldn't let him. He wondered what she was thinking of at this very moment.  
  
But fatigue decided to eat him once more, and Tokiya found his eyelids dropping uncontrollably. After all that he did to assist Yanagi and save her, his energy was spent in 5 hours. His head leaned over to the pillow, a few good inches away from Fuuko's and drifted away to a peaceful slumber.  
  
::A promise was broken  
  
And you did leave me.  
  
Now, I'm all alone.  
  
I'm still alone.  
  
You're not yet back.  
  
I want you back.  
  
I want your arms to hug me.  
  
I want your hand in mine.::  
  
A pair of deep blue orbs opened slowly. Confused and groggy, Fuuko tried to regain her senses and looked around; searching for pieces to fit the current puzzle she was in. She was under warm covers, on a soft bed but she was in a different place. Did someone kidnap her after she fainted at the park? She could only remember so little. She brought up one hand to rub her eyes.  
  
She tried to pull up the other, only to find that it was enclosed in someone's hand. There, lying beside her was the head of Tokiya, with his eyes closed. It was obvious that he was asleep. She sat up in a crossed leg position, her hand leaving his. Fuuko started to remember what happened...what she did, and who went to her rescue.  
  
Right. She was standing under the rain, getting ready to kill herself. At that point in time, she was tired of life's misery and her own. She wanted to see him. The knife seemed to be an emergency exit for her. An express ticket to where he was waiting.  
  
Someone stopped her. Fuuko could vaguely recall Tokiya running towards her after she had made the cut. Grabbing her shoulders, and shaking her like mad. She didn't want to see him back then. She only wanted to see one person who could truly make her happy.  
  
Don't give up on me. Not yet. Those were the last 2 sentences she heard before blacking out. Once again, Tokiya managed to come into the scene and attempt to drag her out of her depression and death. Well, he was victorious in one. She was still alive, but she couldn't say whether her depression was cured or not. She didn't even know whether to thank him for saving her, or to yell at him for stopping her once again.  
  
"You're awake."  
  
Fuuko jolted from her position and saw Mikagami sitting up and crossing his arms. She did the same. "Yeah." She said in a dead tone.  
  
"How are you feeling?" was the first thing he asked.  
  
"I'm feeling fine." She replied, curtly.  
  
His facial expression relaxed a bit. "Your wounds are gone, thanks to Yanagi. You've been asleep for about 6 hours already." He stated.  
  
She nodded. "I see."  
  
"That was a really dumb thing for you to do Fuuko. What brought you to think that way?"  
  
Fuuko eyebrows went up. So this was a lecture? She frowned. What was going on in here? Surely, he was right in being concerned and everything. He did save her life but what right did he have in scolding her like some older protective brother?  
  
And as if he read her mind, Tokiya went on. "I have every right to scold you. You could've have died---"  
  
"That was what I was intending to do." She butted in sarcastically.  
  
He ignored her last comment. "...and no one would've have noticed. It was a good thing Yanagi spotted you. She was really worried about you and there you go, trying to end your life just like that. What the hell has gone inside your mind for the past days that made you decide to do this?"  
  
Fuuko rolled her eyes. He WAS lecturing her. Heaven forbid, Tokiya Mikagami was admonishing someone out of concern. Yes, Fuuko had already seen Mikagami for the past days, trying to help her and everything. She still wasn't used to the immediate concern, especially from someone whom she least expected to help her. And all the more, she wasn't used to seeing Tokiya in a sudden new personality after being with his icy persona for 3 years.  
  
She wasn't the slightest bit irritated this time that he was reproving her. She had been thinking about it and maybe killing herself wasn't the smartest idea in the world. She had thought about that along with the other things before he woke up. Or maybe it was because she was too drained to become irritable and cold…well, whatever it was Fuuko didn't feel like starting another heated argument with Tokiya. She slowly brought herself back to the present, out of her thoughts and back to Tokiya's incessant talking.  
  
"...you shouldn't be doing this. You are so damn lucky that we found you--- Fuuko, are you listening to me?"  
  
She groaned inwardly. "Yes, okasaama. I heard every word of your speech and I am sorry for causing you so much trouble today."  
  
Tokiya's eyebrow went up as if to say, 'What the hell…this isn't a good time to play around.'  
  
Fuuko saw that and cleared her throat. "No, honestly. I'm really, very sorry that you had to go through so much trouble. Both you and Yanagi. It's my silliness and carelessness that brought this about. I'm really sorry about everything." She said, her eyes speaking with sincerity.  
  
"Don't forget stupidity." He added, unfolding his arms.  
  
"Whatever Tokiya." She shrugged. "Wait a minute...why am I actually apologizing to you? I mean, I really did want to see hell at that time...so why did you stop me?"  
  
She was also thinking about that. Why did he undergo the pains of having to save her when he could actually let her go and be spared from the agony? And Fuuko would be gone from the world she detested so much. Why did he save her? They would have both been happy had he not interrupted.  
  
Fuuko turned to Tokiya awaiting his answer. The latter was deep in thought, his arms crossed once more. There was a heavy pause before he replied. "I was worried about you."  
  
Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline. Just what did he say right now? Fuuko wanted to shake her head in pure disbelief but her ears had not lied to her. Tokiya Mikagami was worried about her. THE Tokiya Mikagami.  
  
"And just so you know," he continued. "I'm not doing this for Yanagi. I'm doing this for you and also as a favor to my sister up there."  
  
Fuuko bit her lip. This was just great. Tokiya was just added to the list Yanagi and the others were already on. Great, another one. She could not bear to handle another nosy person who would keep on following her forever and ever, bugging her about handling death and such issues.  
  
"I appreciate your concern Tokiya..." she began slowly. "But, I really don't need anyone to take care of my right now. I'm okay, now. See? I won't try to kill myself anymore. Besides, you probably won't understand--- Aachoo!" her words were cut with her sneezing.  
  
He handed her a box of kleenex. "Thanks..." she said and sneezed again.  
  
"Wrong Fuuko." He smirked. "Number 1, you are obviously NOT okay because you have been under the mercy of the flu. I'm expecting a hint of fever any minute now. You've been under the rain for too long that your body's about to give up on you. And number two, even if you didn't have a flu, I'd still keep you in my house because you're still not emotionally stable."  
  
Fuuko finished blowing her nose and stared at him with her jaw open. "Oh, no...I'm perfectly fine with the cold thing, Tokiya. It's not as if I'm going to die any moment now…and as for my emotional instability…I'm working on it! I don't need anyone right now to bug me on the topic." She grumbled.  
  
"Stop complaining Kirisawa. Yanagi ordered this. I would have sent you home hours ago if she had not requested anything..."  
  
"Yanagi again? See, that is the problem. Why the hell are you following her? I mean, I want to go home and I'm sure you want me to. Let me out of your place already Tokiya...I want to go home now. Anyway, you wouldn't have any space for me in here..." she began arguing with him.  
  
"Fuuko, are you saying that my apartment's small? Take a good look around first will you?"  
  
He was right. It was pretty big. Fuuko opened her mouth once more. "Well, where am I going to stay then? I mean, you live alone and there's..."  
  
"I have a guestroom." He answered briskly.  
  
"But what about---"  
  
"NO IFS AND BUTS." Tokiya raised his voice a few decibels higher than usual. "Fuuko, you are staying here until you get better. Period."  
  
Fuuko slumped onto the bed, in a defeated position. She still wanted to argue and kick Mikagami's butt, but she had to confess that she was feeling a bit weary and dizzy. She sneezed again and lay back on the pillow, breathing loudly.  
  
"You see," Tokiya stood up and placed his hand over her forehead. "You have a fever right now. I bet this wouldn't have come as soon as this if you hadn't exerted that much effort into arguing with me, knowing that you'd lose anyway."  
  
"Shut up Mikagami." She muttered darkly, swatting his hand away. She was near to pouting like a little child. Fuuko groaned in frustration, she was going to be stuck with this arrogant person until she gets better which seemed a long way off from now. Fuuko coughed. She can't be sick...she didn't want to get sick. She wanted to be alone once more.  
  
Fuuko felt loneliness creep up to her side and her vibrant spirit was shaken. If she wanted anyone to take care of her, it would be Raiha and not Tokiya. Her loved one was indeed much gentler with her than he was. He would be...no, he's strict, sarcastic and has a tongue that matches hers. What a perfect guy, she though wearily. Fuuko didn't want to stay with him for any longer than 2 minutes.  
  
But she had no choice. Her eyes became heavy again.  
  
::Where are you when I need you the most?::  
  
**********  
  
Tokiya watched Fuuko sleep quietly for the second time. Satisfied that the girl managed to accept defeat in their recent argument, he settled himself comfortably on his master's chair and relaxed for a while. It was hard to put up with Fuuko whenever she wanted something so bad...especially now. And the fact that Tokiya had not gotten any rest since he brought Fuuko in did not help in any way. He was still tired, yet he forced himself to stay awake. He was grateful that she didn't try anything bad while he fell asleep for a few minutes beside her. But now that she knew about the plan of him keeping her in his apartment, she would do anything to get out. And because of that, he must keep awake. Knowing Fuuko, she would try all sorts of things just to escape him.  
  
Tokiya frowned. Was he despised that much? True, he WAS cold and showed nothing but an untouchable aura whenever he met the Hokage. But that was 3 years ago already. He was sure that he had changed a lot...most especially over the summer.  
  
So why were they still dreading him, except for Yanagi?  
  
Because he didn't take the time to be with them. Tokiya answered his own question and upon realizing it, sighed and felt his shoulders droop. Right. He never did really spend time with them over the 3 years. That was long. He was already 19 and still his former teammates refused to go near him. Well, he thought, not that they refused to go near him but they were indeed uncomfortable. He shook his head. Maybe it was time that he showed them the results of his previous exorcism.  
  
But not now. He had other things to think of. Like Fuuko, for example and how he would help her get out of this mess. 'Boy, aren't you really concerned?' a voice taunted him.  
  
Shut up, he thought, glaring into space.  
  
Though, the voice was right. He was concerned about Fuuko. He did manage to surprise himself by saving her from committing suicide. Tokiya still wasn't sure of his intentions. It was just...something, which kept him near Fuuko. There was a magnet somewhere there. He just couldn't figure it out.  
  
Tokiya Mikagami, one of the most intelligent people in history, did not understand the makings of attraction.  
  
He slapped his forehead. Attraction? That word nearly brought him to spitting the tea he was drinking to keep him awake. He was definitely NOT attracted to Fuuko, he told that voice in his head sternly. She was not his type [and probably no one will ever be] and she still loved Raiha even though he was basking in the other world by now. So, out with the silly idea and focus on helping her.  
  
Still, he couldn't keep himself from staring at her. 3 years was a long time and Tokiya had noticed something about Fuuko. She had grown out of her tomboyish shape and even though she was looking incredibly thin and frail, Tokiya couldn't help but notice the womanly curves on her body.  
  
Stop it Tokiya, he warned himself.  
  
So Fuuko grown up into a woman. So what? The corner of his mouth lifted to form a smirk. Just because this fighter had grown out of her tough and boyish exterior doesn't mean he'd fall head over heels for her. That would be stupid. And so unlike the Tokiya everyone knew.  
  
The Tokiya everyone knew wasn't a pleasant image to think of. He sighed, knowing that he had to change his reputation from being iceman...to something else. Well, whatever it was that he was going to show them, it would have to be better than before.  
  
"That's number 2 on my mid year's resolution..." Tokiya muttered quietly. He checked the clock for the time and saw that it was nearly 11 pm. That was weird, he thought. Time flew so quickly whenever he took time to think about certain issues. He removed his eyes from the clock and brought them back to Fuuko's dozing figure. He debated with himself for a few minutes, whether he should go to bed and leave her alone or to watch her sleep.  
  
Tokiya wanted to sleep. He needed it badly. So what was he going to do now? He was worried that the girl would get up in the middle of the night and sneak away to do something as foolish as killing herself. Then again, he would still fall asleep on the job. He was extremely tired, for some reason.  
  
He decided to sleep outside on the couch. He'd leave the door open. That would enable him to hear anything. Tokiya stood up from his chair and proceeded to go hit the showers. With one last glance at Fuuko, he swung the door open and left it as it was.  
  
*************  
  
"Fuuko."  
  
"Who is it? Who are you?"  
  
"Fuuko, it's me."  
  
"...Raiha?!"  
  
"Right."  
  
"Wha...What are you doing?"  
  
"Fuuko, I came here to check on you. It seems like you haven't been doing so well these past months. I'm very worried about you."  
  
"Is it...is it really you? Am I dreaming?"  
  
"It's me. I'm talking to you through your dreams. Don't worry. This is real."  
  
"Everything...everything's been terrible. I've missed you so much. Where did you go? Why did you have to leave me here alone?"  
  
"You very well know that I couldn't stay here any longer..."  
  
"Even so! I tried to follow you...I wanted to be with you again."  
  
"You tried to follow me in the most idiotic manner, Fuuko. Why did you do that? You scared the living lights out of your friends."  
  
"I don't care about them! I care about you. I want you back here with me. I didn't care if I had to make a pact with the devil or someone as long as I could be with you once more. I can't...I can't take the pain any longer. You know I can't. You can see me, right? I'm suffering right now."  
  
"I know it's hard for you. But there's nothing you can do about it anymore-- -"  
  
"Yes I can! I've read about those reincarnations books...or I really could try dying already. Don't you see? I've got no will to live anymore if I'm not beside you."  
  
"Fuuko, don't talk like that. And you can't bring me back by means of that reincarnation magic you're talking about. The only way you'll get to see me again is when you enter the world I'm living in right now. Mind you, suicide won't get you in here."  
  
"Then WHAT should I do? I'm living point-blank here. I'm confused."  
  
"I'll tell you what you should do. Stop acting this way. Don't build walls around you. People are trying to reach you Fuuko. Don't isolate yourself from them. They're trying to help you. I'm telling you right now that you cannot, I repeat, CANNOT do this by yourself. Admit it. You need them."  
  
"You sound like Mikagami."  
  
"Do I? Well, speaking of Mikagami, you should pay attention to him. I think of all the people, he's been the one who's been most dedicated to helping you. I believe he's right in keeping you here for now. You need his help."  
  
"Great. So now, you're taking his side."  
  
"I'm not taking any sides. This is what's best for you. Trust me please."  
  
"...I guess, I guess I'll try."  
  
"That's my girl. You do know that I love you."  
  
"I know. I just...I just miss you so much."  
  
"I miss you too. But missing me like this won't help. You've got to move on."  
  
"Everyone's telling me to move on. They don't know how hard it is."  
  
"I can see how hard it is. You're strong Fuuko. You can handle this."  
  
"What makes you sure I can? I'm not even sure of myself."  
  
"Just trust me. I know. Besides...there's an angel there who's watching over you like crazy."  
  
"Mikagami is no angel, I assure you."  
  
"Fuuko, you still manage to make me laugh here in the afterlife. Go with Mikagami. You both know what it feels like to lose someone. He can talk to you better than anyone else in the Hokage."  
  
"But I...I..."  
  
"Fuuko, I'm going now."  
  
"No! Don't leave yet. I still want to speak to you..."  
  
"My time's over. I hope you understand what I've told you. Will you try to do it Fuuko? For me?"  
  
"Hai...I will."  
  
"Don't cry now. It hurts me to see you cry."  
  
"Raiha..."  
  
"Raiha?"  
  
"Raiha?!" she jerked up from her sleep and stared into the emptiness of the room. It was real. He was there. He talked to her. Yet...It was too soon; too soon for her to handle. Just the sound of his voice made her long for him again. "Raiha..." her lower lip trembled.  
  
Her tears made their way to her eyes once more and started to fall down.  
  
*****  
  
Tokiya nearly dropped his glass and quickly turned his head to the open door of his room. He was sure he heard Fuuko crying. He placed his glass of milk on the counter and padded across the kitchen towards his room. A warm bath helped him clear his thoughts and relax. He had changed from his clothes to comfortable pajamas and was simply enjoying a glass of warm milk when he heard someone sobbing cry. The stillness of the night was enough for his ears to sense anything.  
  
He entered the room and before him was a sad scene. Fuuko's arms were wrapped around her legs and she was crying---actually sobbing.  
  
"Fuuko?"  
  
She didn't respond but shook her head. Leave me alone, that was all that it took for Tokiya to get the message. But he decided to be stubborn and walked to the bed and sat on the edge of it. He placed his hand on the shaking shoulder.  
  
"Daijoubu?" and he waited for her to answer.  
  
"I'm…I'm fine...just had a bad dream." She said in a muffled voice.  
  
"What would that dream be about?"  
  
"Nothing..."  
  
"Fuuko, if it was nothing then why do I see tears falling from your eyes?"  
  
Fuuko stopped for a moment and paused. Tokiya could hear her breathing heavily. "It was...it was a dream. Raiha was there...and he was talking to me. He was there, Mikagami. I wasn't hallucinating. I was talking to him..." she said, shakily.  
  
"And...?"  
  
"He talked to me...about things. He was telling me to move on...well, I don't know anymore. All I know is that he left me again. It was too soon. It was just too soon for me to handle. I want him back Mikagami...because I miss him so much."  
  
::I miss you so much.::  
  
She felt herself breaking into a million pieces again. But this time, she wasn't alone. Fuuko felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around her and bring her into a tight embrace.  
  
::You don't have to do this.::  
  
At first, she was taken by surprise...then she decided that she didn't care anymore. She missed something when Raiha died. The comfort of someone hugging you and making sure that you're all right. The feeling of being protected. For the longest time ever, Fuuko had felt alone and empty. But now, there was someone giving her the opportunity.  
  
::I want to be comforted.::  
  
She accepted it, and pressed her face against his chest. Her tears and sadness mixed with the soft clothing and she found herself being pulled closer. Fuuko buried her pride along with her stubbornness and let tears flow free.  
  
He simply stayed there, cheek against her hair and whispering  
  
It's alright. I'm here for you.  
  
They both stayed there for quite some time. Fuuko, herself buried in Tokiya's arms...and he, holding her tightly. Tokiya waited for her tears to subside. It took quite some time, but he didn't care. It was fine with him. Just knowing that he was making her feel slightly better was enough for him to endure a hundred hours holding her like that.  
  
For him, the moment was almost perfect.  
  
But even the saddest moments end. Soon, Fuuko pulled back wiping her tears with the back of her hand. Tokiya didn't let her go just yet.  
  
"Are you feeling better?" he asked gently.  
  
Fuuko nodded, still wiping her tears away. Tokiya brought one hand to stop her and the other wiped the corner of her eye with his thumb. He brushed away the drops of liquid slowly and carefully. Fuuko closed her eyes and exhaled slowly.  
  
"You know...you really look ugly when you're crying." He told her softly, while continuing his act of kindness. "You should lighten up a bit, Fuuko. I know it's been really hard for you and all, but you should try. It would hurt...right?"  
  
"I know..." Fuuko sniffed. "It's just that I find it really hard to let go of the pain."  
  
"Pain isn't easy to remove. " he agreed. "But that's why I'm here."  
  
She nodded, her face against his chest once more. "I'm...I'm glad you're here. There were many nights when I just woke up from nightmares and had no one beside me. It was hard and scary. I was all alone."  
  
"Well, you did move away from the rest."  
  
"That's why I regret it so much." She whispered. "I'm tired of feeling this pain. I just want everything to be alright again. And Raiha...he told me to move on. I can't seem to..."  
  
"Fuuko," he told her resolutely, "stop thinking that you can't. You CAN. I believe you can. You shouldn't torture yourself like this. Hell," he said, his hands cupping her cheeks, "You don't deserve this."  
  
She was forced to stare into his pale blue eyes, full of concern. While hers were filled with anxiety and pain, his were calm and peaceful. Not to mention, capturing. Fuuko never did notice his eyes. All she knew before was that he could send daggers with them. Now they weren't the slightest bit icy.  
  
Fuuko tore herself away from his eyes and pulled back. He let his arms fall to his sides and he looked at her, expecting something to come out of her mouth.  
  
So she complied with his request. "Thank you," she stammered a bit as tints of pink went up her cheek. "I'm sorry if I woke you up or anything...I think I even wet your clothes..."  
  
Tokiya stared at his pajama top. Indeed, there was a wet spot by his shoulder and upper torso. He smirked in reply. "It's alright. I wasn't asleep yet. And...um, I don't mind if the pjs are wet. I don't favor them that much anyway..."  
  
He was right. What was with the pajamas he was wearing? Fuuko found herself smiling. They even had cookie prints. How cute, she giggled faintly.  
  
Tokiya noticed her reaction. She was smiling. "What?" he asked. "I'm sorry, but I only managed to iron these things. The others will just have to wait...and you should keep your mouth shut." He said, mock-grouchily as Fuuko started laughing softly.  
  
"You look like a cookie monster with that scowl on your face."  
  
"Whatever." He rolled his eyes. "You should get some sleep now." He said, pointing to the alarm clock on his bedside table. Past 12 midnight.  
  
Fuuko glanced at the machine and agreed with him. She felt much better. A huge load was lifted from her shoulders and she was grateful for that. "Yeah..." she yawned involuntarily and covered her mouth. "Sorry." She blinked.  
  
"Well, go to bed." Tokiya told her, pushing her shoulders down gently, enough to make her fall back into the cushioned mattress. He pulled the covers around her and tucked them. "Good night. I'm by the couch if you need anything. Oh, btw...I'll be needing this." He snatched one pillow from the bed and with that, he stood up and headed for the doorway.  
  
Fuuko squirmed a bit and turned to face him. "Hey, Mikagami..."  
  
"Hn?" he turned his head slightly.  
  
"Do you sleep with your hair down?"  
  
He made a motion to throw the pillow at her.


	4. Diversion

**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.  
**  
**A/N:** Hello again to everyone. I am so, so sorry about taking so long to post this. I had the longest and more severe case of writer's block. Plus, school and final exams were such a big burden to me. Anyway, this is part 4. If you noticed, I changed the teaser. I was never good at them...and this one only came up a few minutes ago. The whole plot doesn't revolve only on Tokiya helping Fuuko get over her frustrations and nightmares...it's also about someone *****hints* who eventually falls for another person's charms.

BTW, it may look OOC to see Tokiya so nice and carefree...but time causes change. He's a completely different person here. We all see the side some people wish for. The what-would-happen-if-Tokiya-was-born-a-nice-guy.

**Chapter 4: Diversion**

A pair of blue eyes tinged with the slightest tint of violet found themselves staring at a set of ice blue orbs. She raised her hand to rub them. A short yawn followed.

"What are you doing?" she stretched her arms, nearly hitting his jaw. "What time is it anyway?"

"It's 10 am, princess. It's about time you get up already." Tokiya replied sarcastically, standing up from his position and drawing back the curtains. Immediately, the room was filled with rays of sunshine that illuminated the darker corners.

Another yawn ensued. "Only 10 am? You must be kidding." She pulled the covers over her head and curled up to the opposite side.

He raised his eyebrow. "Only 10 am?" he repeated. "What the heck are you talking about?"

"Yeah, ONLY 10 am." Came the muffled reply beneath the warm layers of cloth.

Shaking his head in disbelief, Tokiya strode over to his bed and with one smooth tug, had the covers off a lethargic Fuuko. "What time do you get up anyway?"

Seeing that she could not do anything about the situation, Fuuko released a small grumble and immediately pulled herself up in a sitting position, tucking her legs under each one. "On weekdays, I get up at 7, but on Saturdays and Sundays...12 is the usual habit."

"Boy, you do get a lot of hibernating time."

"Shut up, fridge boy." She returned, sticking her tongue out at him. "What time do YOU wake up on weekends like this? I bet it would be something as earlier as 8, knowing you."

"Actually Fuuko," the corners of his mouth went up, forming a small, sassy smirk. "I wake up much earlier than that. 6 am is the average time for me."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh I forgot. Mikagami is the perfect man, with the perfect timing. I bet you love watching the sun rise too."

"Indeed I do." He nodded, his smile widening.

Fuuko was about to make another reply when she noticed the lean man crossing his arms and smiling at her strangely. Although his smile wasn't weird---it was one that would make the average girl into happy heaven---she found it odd. 

"What?"

"You're smiling. Why?" she asked him. 

"Is there anything wrong with smiling, Fuuko?" He returned the question with another one. 

"No..." she tore herself from staring into his features. "It's just that...I'm not used to seeing you smile." 

He unfolded his arms and looked at her profusely. "Why do you say that?" 

"Do I need to explain, Mikagami? I mean, don't tell me that after years of knowing you, with your sardonic replies and cold exterior, that you would have no idea why I'd be slightly bewildered to see you smiling? I mean, how many times have you done this? Not quite often, really. Right now, I'd say that it's almost ironic to even see you with such a light aura." 

"You're right Fuuko. I haven't done this often while I was with you guys." He admitted, openly. 

She swung her legs under her lap. "Yeah well, that was one thing all of us wanted to tell you. You were too cold for everyone. How would you feel, standing next to some gigantic, grouchy and miserable polar bear?" 

He laughed. "Polar bear?" 

"Yeah. What's wrong with that?" 

"Ice-man, Fridge boy, Mr. Freeze..." Tokiya started ticking off his fingers. "And now polar bear? Not up to your usual standards Fuuko." 

"That's NOT my point!" She swatted him. 

Tokiya let out a small chuckled, moving his head a few inches back to avoid Fuuko's playful smack. "Okay, okay. I get your point." And before she could argue some more, he continued. "Why don't we discuss this during breakfast?" 

She blinked. "Breakfast?" 

"Right. I'm giving you 30 minutes to get dressed and then we're going out." 

"We are? Why? You can't cook?" She teased him at the last sentence. 

He mockingly glared at her. "I CAN cook, but I'm not in the mood to do it right now. Besides...I've got the feeling that you're a bit too tired of this place already." 

"Yeah, but still...I don't want to be a bother to you or anything." 

He cocked an eyebrow. "Excuse me? Are you trying to be polite or something? I'm already offering you a free meal, and still you refuse?" 

"Tokiya, it's not that...what about my clothes? They're way back in my house." She reasoned. 

"Problem solved." He pointed to a small duffel bag, sitting by the corner of the room. "I picked them up. Yanagi selected them, so you have no worries on me going through your private stuff." 

"I see you've already taken the liberty of moving my things to your dwellings now." 

"No. Inside that bag is a pair of pants and a shirt. I don't know what else Yanagi placed in there. I'm still thinking about putting you up here. So don't get your hopes up yet." 

She clasped her hands in fake delight. "Oh that is SO wonderful! What made you change your mind?" 

"This tiny deliberation of ours has my wits on its end."

"Brilliant." Fuuko gleefully giggled. "Sure. I'll get ready." She hopped off from the soft mattress and pushed him towards the door. "I'll see you in a few minutes." 

"Right." He muttered, hoping that she wouldn't take as long as those women he'd seen at school, hogging the showers. He had heard enough complaints from his classmates on women taking over the showers for over an hour or so after a simply 30 minute gym class. 

*******

Fuuko entered the warm tub and carefully lowered herself in. A soft sigh escaped her mouth as her muscles began to relax. The heat helped her to loosen up and she sank comfortably within the waters surrounding her. 

She started to play with the tiny ripples a few inches above her lap. The drops of water reminded her of Tokiya wielding his madougu during the tournament days. Her eyes closed and she distinctly remembered everyone fighting to save Yanagi and their own weapons. 

Domon's victories against Aki and that masked corpse from the Uruha, her kick-butt battle against that pervert Fujimaru and that honorable defeat of Gashakura...Kogenei's smart moves that sliced everything to pieces. And of course, Recca's win against the master of the whole Uruha, Kurei. They all went home triumphant and proud of themselves and their accomplishments. 

She smiled. At least those days were over. 

On the other hand, their aloof team mate Tokiya, didn't get what he want. They all knew about his never-ending revenge for his dead sister Mifuyu. He was forever touchy about the subject...and Fuuko could only imagine how the ensui wielder felt when his battle with Kai revealed the true murderer. That only happened to be Meguri Kyoza. The man who took Tokiya right after the death of his sister to train him with the secrets of the dark water. 

Fuuko couldn't help but feel sorry for the bitter man back then. All the anguish and pain reflected in his eyes, whenever he would face them. 

Now she wondered if Tokiya was truly finished dealing with the ghosts of his past. He seemed so peaceful and calm now. What did the guy do to overcome everything? Was it that super long vacation of his in the other side of the country? Was it a classmate, a teacher or perhaps, Fuuko bit her lip. A new girl? 

Impossible. He didn't care for the opposite sex no more than he would for a pair of boots. They were nothing to him. 

::Why do I care anyway?:: 

She shrugged. She had no relationship with Mikagami whatsoever. Last night was simply an act of brotherly comfort, at least for her. Furthermore, Raiha was the person she missed the most. No one in this world mattered more to her than him. He was her universe until he left her. She felt her eyes mist and she instantly submerged her face underwater. 

::I'm not going to cry anymore. I'm going to stop this nonsense right now. I'm going to do it for you.:: 

She vowed to herself to get over it. She was tough and she could do this. 

******* 

"Now, I have something to ask you." Tokiya sipped his juice, amidst small laughs. "I'm sorry that we have to jump from Domon's latest fashion ensemble...but there's something that's been bugging my head." 

They had already discussed small subjects of varying aspects. They had started from Rome to food, the line of clothing women would wear, what Fuuko would detest and what disgusted Tokiya. Now, he decided to ask something that had mystified him a little since the start of the morning.

"Shoot." She speared another slice of pancake on her fork and popped it in her mouth. She placed her arms on the table and looked at him expectantly. 

He set his glass down and did the same with his arms. "Why the sudden change?" 

She was about to put another forkful into her mouth when she heard him ask. She stared at him for a moment and put her fork down on her plate. "What do you mean?" 

"When I went into your room this morning, I was expecting to see you in your depressed state again. I thought that it would actually take me a few more debates to get you to have breakfast with me. But then, I see you wide awake and with enough guts to actually challenge me with your sharp tongue...it sent me wondering on what happened to you." 

She was quiet for a few moments, and he was near to guessing that she was only masking everything. If that was the case, then he was right. She was just pretending to be happy. Tokiya after all, considered this, thinking that she might just be doing it to push his attempts away. Still, he needed to hear it from her. 

"You know, I should be asking you the same question." She responded softly. 

"Hmm?" He cut his musings short. 

"Well..." she hesitated for a minute, looked down at her plate and then stared at him intently. "I um, was thinking about what happened last night." 

"You mean, your dream?" 

She nodded. "I gave a lot of thought to what Raiha said to me. I'm taking it not as a dream...but probably as his real message. And I'm also...well, considering that maybe I DO need help from people. I dunno. Maybe I should just give it a try. After all...it wouldn't hurt, would it?" she looked at him hopefully. 

"No. It wouldn't." he nodded slowly. 

"Also, um..." she fiddled with the napkin of her lap. "I want to thank you for your help last night. I hate to admit it...but without your help, I would still be the same old depressed me today. For some reason, Raiha woke me up with his words. And you...you were there for me. I don't know how to thank you." 

He held her hand for a split second. "Don't mention it. I saw that you needed help...so I came to your aid. You looked like you needed it badly." 

"No really," she persisted. "I don't think I deserved it. After I was so bitchy to you and everything..."

"It's alright Fuuko. Stop blaming yourself too much. Remember, I was worse." He reminded her of the days when he was the coldest man on the planet and would not let any warmth enter his heart. 

"Yeah...well, you could say that. Still, I'm really sorry Tokiya. I was such a bitch to you, Yanagi, Recca and everyone I knew. It was totally unfair to everyone of you." She said, shaking her head sadly. "I don't know how you'll ever forgive me."

"It's alright Fuuko. It's not your fault that he died. Everyone has to undergo pain some time or another. I understand how you feel. Believe me."

She laughed nervously. "I guess it's my turn to be grouchy now, isn't it?"

"Probably. Ice Queen."

"What?" she broke off from the somber discussion and looked at him surprised.

He shrugged. "It's better than polar bear, mind you."

"You are such a smart ass!" she rolled her eyes. "...are we friends now?" she timidly held her hand up. "I promise not to snap at you anymore and I'll agree to be your patient from now on, Dr. Mikagami."

He smiled inwardly and shook her hand. 

Progress. It was working. Albeit slow, but enough for him. It would be easier than he thought. Still, he knew that change doesn't take that fast. He wouldn't be hasty. Instead, he had to wait for her to open up and slowly get over everything. Things took time. Unfortunately, he was one of the few around Fuuko who knew that. He didn't expect Yanagi or Recca to understand. They were too happy. They never experienced anything such as this. Kogenei was a kid. Not much there either. As for Domon...well, Tokiya had already erased the option before any other mental image of Domon pleading Fuuko to marry him would enter his mind. 

So it was all up to him now? 

Not that he was complaining about the heavy load...but like Fuuko said a couple of hours earlier, getting used to a new personality was not simple.

"Tokiya? Tokiya? Earth to Mikagami." Fuuko waved her fork in front of him. 

"Huh? Yeah, what?" he shook his head slightly and blinked, quickly erasing his dazed look.

"Gee, you nearly scared me." Fuuko put the silver utensil down on her empty plate. "You went off to dreamland while I gobbled up the rest of my food."

He looked at his own plate. There were still remnants of the blueberry waffles he ordered. 

"If you're not hungry anymore, I can finish them for you." Fuuko joked, her arm reaching over for his plate. "I'd be more than happy to."

He smacked her fork away with his knife. "No thank you. I can finish them myself." 

Fuuko grinned. "Can I then take the permission to order some more food? I'm still hungry."

He glimpsed at her while chewing the fodder. "You eat a lot for someone of that build." He remarked after a few seconds. "Go ahead. It's on me, remember?"

"Yokata!"

Tokiya continued finishing the remainder of his breakfast as he watched Fuuko call for a waiter and order another serving chocolate chip pancakes. He was no doubt, amused at her bubbly trait. A complete irony compared to the Fuuko he met a day ago. It amazed him to no end, seeing how fast she could switch moods. The only puzzle to him now was if she really and truly meant what she was acting right now. She could fool any guy with those capturing eyes and the innocent façade. 

However, Tokiya was not an ordinary guy. He just wanted to make sure. He knew that under that effervescent facet, hid a shattered spirit and lonely emotions. For some reason, he just knew. But she was a great actress. Did she act this way before she decided to let him help her?

Maybe. The incident at the park was probably an outburst of emotion. He was sure that she hid everything from the world. The reason? He couldn't determine. There were many to choose from. Pride, grief, her personal motives...he had no clue.

He also did not understand why he was staring at her. 

"Tokiya, if you don't quit that, you might be the one to end up in a mental hospital." Her voice shook his focused vision on her locks of deep violet. "You look like one of those ordinary guys in school who come to ogle at me..." She teased.

"Wh..what?" he asked indignantly. "For your information, I have no intention of becoming one of _them_" he reassured her while scolding himself on the inside.

Staring won't help any of you, he chided himself.

"Well, while you were dreaming again, I managed to finish everything. Tell me, Tokiya...you're thinking of someone, aren't you?"

"Thinking of someone, yes. Who, I wouldn't say." He answered, slyly covering the fact that he WAS indeed staring at her for the past 5 minutes.

Fuuko smirked. "Oh really now...tell me, is it someone you like?"

"Err...no."

"Come on Mikagami..." she prodded. 

"I told you, it's no one, so stop asking me."

Fuuko grinned. "It wasn't such a big deal, then why are you blushing?"

"I'm not blushing." He stated plainly, trying to cover his flustered state.

"Yes you are! I can see hints of red around your face. Ohmigod, I never thought I'd see the day when the abominable snowman would turn red."

He nearly choked on those waffles he was trying to digest in the midst of her repartee. "Snowman? You are really losing it Fuuko. I can think of better names."

"Whatever. You're trying to change the subject!" 

"I'm not. I'm stating the truth."

"Ohoho, excuse me...Mikagami," she raised her finger at him. "I'm not the one denying the facts here. Who's the one trying to escape the common knowledge that he was blushing because I accused him of thinking of some, ahem, girl?"

"I'm telling you," he swallowed the last piece of waffle, "there is no one. Get off my case!"

There really wasn't anyone. He couldn't understand what she was talking about. Women, he muttered to himself. They make all sorts of gossip. Fuuko, for example, was no exception. For the last time, there wasn't anyone!

Was there? 

Why the heck was he getting all disturbed by her teasing? The sea monkey and gorilla had both troubled him before with the same subject and he was able to dismiss them with a few glares and short words. Fuuko shouldn't be a problem. Yet obviously, she was. Fuuko was such a conundrum. First, she was moody, sharp and silent...next thing he knew, she was back to her old self to the point of actually mocking him. It was apparent that she was making an effort to surmount this impediment. 

So why am I still thinking about you like this? He asked himself. Almost immediately, the answer was provided for him. The fact that maybe it was because he was thinking about her dawned upon Tokiya.

He was at the most, guilty for letting himself fall into her spell. 


	5. Charm and Perplexity

Isolation

Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.

**A/N: **Hi again! Here we go with the next chapter of Isolation. I was looking back at some of the chapters and noticed that there were some grammatical errors there. Typos. Gomen nasai! I wrote that during a really hot afternoon and everything was making me sleepy. ^^;; Anyway, expect more staring from Tokiya since he's only starting, *ahem*, to get amused with Fuuko. However, things aren't as easy as he expects them to be. ...consider that as a preview. **Also, thanks to all the reviewers!** Your reviews help me to write! Thanks again minna!**  
  
Chapter 5: Charm and Perplexity **

"So where are we going next?" Fuuko took the opportunity to ask Tokiya. 

He shrugged in reply. "Where do you want to go?" 

A few hours ago, both were seated and discussing various subjects over servings of waffles and pancakes. Soon after, Fuuko had managed to express a simple apology, which was instantaneously accepted by Tokiya. Strange enough, both found themselves quite comfortable within each other's presence as soon as the simple 'sorry' was uttered. 

However, the comfort of having a friend to talk to wasn't there long enough for him. Half of the time they were there was spent with endless ponderings, momentary looks and all sorts of unknown thoughts that nearly caused him to go crazy. Until now, a tiny voice and a practical conscience argued about how he was feeling for this girl who surprisingly caused his amusement.

"Hmm." Fuuko paused. "The mall?"

Tokiya nodded, finishing the mocha latte he had in his hands. "Why the mall?" he asked as he threw the container into the trashcan. A perfect shot, one might add. He turned to face Fuuko.

Fuuko gave him a strange glimpse and continued walking towards the crossing. "Do you still need to ask women why they would want to go to the mall?"

"If it's a shopping spree you want, it's out." He said cautiously. "I'm not a billionaire, you know. Besides," he added, giving her a side glance, "you don't seem like the type who enjoys them"

"You silly person!" she exclaimed. "I'm not asking you to buy me clothes! I don't include guys in my shopping escapades, for your information. I only do that with Yanagi."

"So what then do you want to do in the mall?"

She blew a few strands of hair from her face. "Probably look around, I guess. I suppose it isn't your cup of tea? We can go somewhere else, if you want. Anyway, I don't get the point of this thing. What are we really supposed to do anyway?" she asked.

"If you want to go around the mall, we can do that." He agreed. "The purpose of this thing? Nothing. Haven't you been taught how to relax Fuuko?" 

"Of course I know how to relax. I'm not a robot." She retorted, paused then continued. "...I haven't really done that for quite some time." She admitted quietly. 

Tokiya took another turn. "Really now, you should lighten up a bit. Being a miserable ice block isn't the nicest thing in the world, isn't it now?"

She gave a little laugh. "I'm surprised Tokiya."

"Why is that?"

"Most of the things you're telling me were what the Hokage used to chide you with a long time ago, remember? 'Lighten up iceman!' or 'Tokiya, come out and have fun with us for a minute' those kind of messages we left in your answering machine...which were never heeded. We actually had to use Yanagi to get you to join us during those rare times..." she mused.

He smiled in amusement. "Consider those times gone. I'm a new person now, so none of you have to talk behind my back like you all used to."

"And you neither have to mutter mocking names about us anymore." She returned with the same smile. "It's my turn to be healed, cured, transformed or whatever."

"Well, this is your chance to loosen up." He responded taking a short turn by the corner. "Here we are." 

Fuuko momentarily forgot her worries as her face lit up at the sight of the tall, silver building hovering over them, casting a long shadow. "Oh goody." She happily picked up her walking pace and grabbed Tokiya's wrist to pull him inside. "Let's go inside."

It was a good thing that Fuuko had all eyes focused on the winding glass doors for she would have noticed Tokiya's cheeks flush pink at the very moment she locked his hand in hers. Like many of the new changes about him, he wasn't used to his hand being held by a girl who, he added silently, had managed to charm him with her remarkable aura.

"Fuuko, wait up. This thing won't burn down, you know." He called out, trying hard not to mind the warm sensation, prickling his hand to his very fingertips. 

She didn't pay any attention to what he said, and tugged harder. "So what?"

So would you please let go of my hand now because frankly, I have no idea on what I'm feeling and why I'm feeling this way, he mumbled privately, nearly stumbling across the marbled floor.

Hold on Tokiya, he drew a deep breath and exhaled. She's only holding your hand. And so? There's nothing wrong with friends holding each other's hands, right? 

So what's with his hand now? And WHY was he blushing then? Fuuko had only CHARMED him. Defined, charm would mean fascination. So he was interested with the way she was handling the situation. That was about it. Was that something to be bothered about? 

Definitely not. His practical side took over his senses and led him back to reality.

"Where are we going from here?" he willed himself to ask, lest he forget himself again and drown within thoughts cause by different hormones running about. 

She had let go of his hand and shrugged, facing him. "I have no idea. You do the choosing."

Relieved that she had done so, he paused to check himself, making sure that all signs of awkwardness were gone, and then replied. "Do you enjoy amusement centers?" 

"Recca, Domon and Kaoru do. Usually Yanagi, Ganko and I do the window shopping." she answered. "But yeah, I occasionally join the guys and whack their butts in the video games."

"I bet I could beat you." He dared her. 

"I'm not so sure you'll be that confident after an hour." She smirked. "Sure, why don't we go there? Winner gets the free food at the movies." She decided.

"Movies?"

"Yup." She glanced at him. "Can we see a movie later?"

His eyes motioned towards the arcade's sign. "I wouldn't care that much since you'll be the one to pay."

"You don't know that yet." She challenged him.

"We'll see." He replied, teasingly.

*******

"Okay, I'll take one large box of salted popcorn and soda please." Tokiya said smugly, his eyes twinkling. 

Fuuko sweatdropped. "Yeah, yeah...whatever. It was a tie! You knew it! We should have set the options to no time limit." She argued.

"I won by .25% Kirisawa." 

"Not to me!" she stuck her tongue out. "Round it off and it does you no good. Since when did you become such an expert in Tekken anyway? It's a tie, believe me." She insisted.

Tokiya shook his head, pointing a finger towards the flashing screen, indicating that player 2 won 5 consecutive rounds. "Sorry. Even the computer believes me."

She took one last glare at the screen and exhaled, blowing playful strands of hair from her eyes. "Fine. Lead the way, champion."

"I think I will."

"Don't get your hopes up. I only have enough money to buy us tickets."

They approached the line. "No, I'll buy the tickets. You can buy the food." He offered, feeling a bit generous this time. "Go ahead."

She looked at him doubtingly before scurrying over to the woman selling all sorts of assorted tidbits. Tokiya watched her for a moment before heading towards the ticket counter. He paid for the tickets, his mind on other things, not even noticing a pair of young girls giggling at his good looks.

He was about to head towards Fuuko when they approached him. 

"May I help you?" he asked politely, his thoughts still on other things.

"Uh, well...I was wondering..." the girl blushed while her companion batted her eyelashes at him. "If I could have your number..."

Oh. Another one of them. 

He was tempted to snub them off as he usually did to the girls his school. But he stopped himself in time. He was a gentleman after all and it probably wasn't that necessary in a place like this. "I'm sorry," he started, "but..."

Fuuko appeared at his side. "Oh, there you are. I was wondering where you went. Here is your order." She raised a plastic container holding a big box of popcorn and a large soda. "Who are they?" she inquired, taking notice of the two standing in front of them. 

The two, realizing that they were obviously not getting anything from him, gave one mean look at Fuuko and a desperate signal at Tokiya (which he promptly ignored) before rushing off. 

Fuuko faced him questioningly. 

"I don't know them," he answered, shrugging.

A smile played on her lips. "I'd take that they're your fawning admirers Tokiya." 

"Not really. That's too much, Fuuko." He replied, returning the smile.

Her grin grew wider. "Oh, so we're being modest now are we? Come on Mikagami. Everyone knows that you're the most popular guy in school, being smart and everything."

"Whatever, you say." He checked his watch. "We'd better be getting in if you don't want to miss the movie. It's due to start in a few minutes." He headed towards the door.

She followed him inside the dark room and to the two seats he chose. "Wait, um, your popcorn and soda."

He paused and glanced at her for a moment. "Oh yeah. Thanks." He took the bag. "No condiments?" he grinned complacently.

"Don't push your luck." She warned him, settling herself down on a chair. "By the way, I hope you don't mind if I placed two straws into the soda can. I might get thirsty later, so expect me to be popping up and taking a short sip from your drink." She leaned back against the velvet cushion and instantly plopped her hand inside the box of popcorn and took some out, popping them into her mouth. 

She's crazy, he thought silently. "What are you doing?"

"Getting what I deserve. I did pay for this thing." She mumbled while chewing the white kernels. "Yuck, Mikagami. Why, of all things, did you have to ask for plain popcorn? It isn't even salted that much."

He dropped a few in his mouth. "It's healthier than butter or cheese. And besides, it isn't THAT plain."

"Yeah, like what? 2 sprinkles of iodized salt?" she asked sarcastically, digging for more. "You worry too much about your health. You already have a perfect figure..."

He was about to tell her not to get anymore if it didn't please her, when her hand brushed against his. He nearly drew back his hand but remembered that it held the box of popcorn. It was there again. That warm feeling that spread throughout his whole hand and face. He was lucky that it was dark and that the movie had started. Or else Fuuko would start bugging him again about his near absent-mindedness. 

He didn't get to pay attention to the movie that much. His mind kept on running around to different corners of his questions. He was still trying to figure out why he was acting this way. It wasn't like him at all. Never in his whole life did he experience these kinds of things. He refused to acknowledge his hormones. His logical side kept on trying to figure out the answers.

After all, that was his whole life.

He always had a quest to find the answers. And now that a simple situation that couldn't be analyzed frustrated him a little. WHY couldn't he explain anything? WHAT was happening to him?

Tokiya leaned towards the can of soda, about to sip from the cool can when he felt something warm against his cheek. He turned his head slightly and found himself staring at Fuuko's lips centimeters away from his. 

He almost jumped back, nearly upsetting the can of Pepsi. 

"Hey!" a startled Fuuko whispered. "What are you doing?!"

He composed himself, his cheeks flaming red with embarrassment. "What do you mean?" he whispered back indignantly. "Don't scare me like that!"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I wasn't intending to scare you. Stop being silly. I was only going to drink from the can. But since you insisted on---"

"SHH! Do you mind?" a voice hushed them.

She gave him one last glare and shifted her eyes back to the screen.

It took him a few minutes before his face finally cooled down and he leaned back against his chair. That was so close and again it had sent him to blushing. Tokiya crossed his arms, furious with himself for acting that way. He was already getting fed up with these kinds of uneasy encounters. And he still didn't know what to do about it. 

Whether mischief was smiling upon him this day, he did not know.

*******

"That was a great movie, wasn't it?" she chattered happily, walking beside him towards the sliding doors of the lobby. "It was a little cheesy though, but it suited me fine. I loved the part when the cop decided to use the big box of ammo to kill the assassin..."

He nodded graciously, motioning for her to go first. She did, but her talking didn't stop. She went rambling on and on about the movie, how good looking the villain was, how the plot was twisted at the end...

"Ei, Mikagami? You're pretty quiet. Something wrong?"

"Hmm? Nope. I'm fine." He responded, though not quite sure himself. 

"You seem a bit dazed." She pointed out. "Didn't enjoy the movie?"

He didn't even pay attention to a singled part! "Uh...it was okay." He lied. 

She scrutinized him for a second. "Wait, don't tell me these are the effects of too much plain popcorn." Fuuko joked, her Prussian eyes laughing at him.

He smiled and faced her. "No. I think I was spared from that." He lingered for a moment and his voice softened. "Hey...that's nice."

"What's nice?"

He tilted her chin with his finger. "Your eyes. They're so bright yet filled with dark blue, the color of the oceans." He mustered thoughtfully, once more getting lost within the depths of her mystery. 

_She is so pretty._

WHAT?! His mind yelled. Oh no, Tokiya. You are definitely NOT falling for her! He was losing it already. What was happening now to him and his guard? Attraction? Come on, man!

"Uh...Mikagami?" her eyes looked at him with questioning.

...But come to think of it, she WAS pretty, after all. Her violet tresses surrounded her delicate face and her eyes were so full of the dark color blue. Her smile, her laugh, her lively way of speaking... It captured him for a moment and he could do nothing but stare at her, helplessly. 

NO. He told himself firmly. Get a grip on yourself. 

Wet drops falling on his shoulder and on her cheek interrupted him. He released her chin and glanced at the sky, now covered with dark gray clouds. 

"It's going to rain." She observed. 

He nodded. "I guess we won't be walking home. I can take you to your place." He offered. 

"How?" she asked, pointing upward to the elements now present.

Tokiya looked around. "We can take the subway." He indicated the small tunnel a few meters across the block they were standing on. "We can take a cab then to your place and then mine."

"Sounds good to me, but we'd better hurry because I believe it's starting to pour down."

They dashed towards the stairs leading to the underground, but not without getting a good number of droplets wetting them profusely. Fuuko took the lead and hurried to the descending steps with him following her. Within a few minutes, they were out of the cold and inside a busy tunnel, streaming with people hurrying off to places and offices. 

Getting the subway tickets didn't take too much time. Tokiya had them in within seconds. The trouble was getting inside the moving cars. It was too crowded with people. They had only managed to get in after waiting for 2 turns of the subway train. Still, they were with a fairly large group of individuals also trying to escape the rain and the traffic.

"Gee, I feel like a sardine here." Fuuko commented.

"Same here." He replied. "Actually, I feel more like the tuna slices packed into those cans---"

The train shuddered, causing him to nearly stumble. 

"Ah..aah..whoa!" Fuuko lost her traction and staggered towards him. Another jerk had her flying into him, causing his hand to immediately wrap itself on her waist to steady her and to prevent both of them from tumbling down. His grip on the metal bars tightened and he secured his balance. "What the..." he muttered at the sudden jolts. "Are you okay?" he asked her.

"Yeah, barely." She responded, shakily. 

Their car shook for another moment and then finally lurched to a stop. The lights flickered then also went off. Nervous and anxious voices filled the car. People were trying to shift and move around, feeling for the emergency exit and alert buttons. 

Tokiya stayed put, making sure his hold on her was firm. "Are you hurt or anything?"

"Nope." She answered, a bit calmer now. "What happened?" 

He squinted his eyes. Nothing. Pitch black. "I reckon it was some electrical problem. They'll probably have it fixed in no time."

"Nice service they have, ne?" Fuuko remarked.

Tokiya didn't reply. On cue, the emergency lights flicked on and most of the people seemed to calm down too. A voice on the PA system announced that there was a technical problem and that the train would be up and running in no time. 

"Phew." Fuuko exhaled in relief. She looked at up him. "Hey Mikagami."

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for catching me. I would have uh...fallen over."

Now that there was light provided, he noticed their position. He held her in such a protective pose that both of their bodies were inches away from each other. Though it was such a warm feeling of security a few moments ago in the dark, he was now starting to feel a bit awkward. He let go of her hastily. "No problem." He told her. "Both of us would have toppled over if I didn't catch you."

He wasn't used to such contact. Especially with a girl like Fuuko. Of course he had his moments with Mifuyu, when he was a younger kid. Problems at the subway were not a surprise to him. They were quite common. But Mifuyu was his older sister, for God's sake! They only had each other. She was entitled to hug him, to tuck him in, to keep him warm, to hold his hand...

This was different. Being with Mifuyu was cozy and snug. Being with Fuuko on the other hand...

He forced himself to stare at the windows, to stop his ceaseless staring and so that she would not notice the color pink creeping up to his cheeks. Fuuko is just a friend, remember? He reminded himself sternly. You are not supposed to entertain any thoughts of appeal. Moreover, she was still trying to get over Raiha's death and you are supposed to help her, not fall for her!

"Hey, we're getting near to our stop." Her voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Oh, right." He sighed, gripping firmly at the bar above him. "You had better hold on." He informed her. 

She obeyed him. A few more seconds, a few shudders were felt as the train halted to a full stop. The doors opened and people rushed out and others went in. He let her walk ahead first before he followed her to the stairs. "We can take a cab from up there." He said. 

Fuuko nodded. "My place isn't that far off anyway." 

"Hopefully, we can get one as soon as possible." He told her, taking note of the downpour that was taking place. It wasn't just any ordinary rainfall. 

"Looks like a storm." She said, echoing his thoughts.

He signaled her to hurry to the corner of the subway station. It was slightly covered by a small roof and it was the only safe place where they could hail a taxi to take them out of here. She followed him quickly and took her place beside him. He inched nearer to her, trying to avoid the rainfall.

"That was fun despite all the bumps, ne?" she commented cheerfully. "I'm not really used to riding the subway, you know. I always walk or bike to school or to the mall."

"Mifuyu and I used to ride them all the time." He found himself saying.

"Really?"

He nodded. "She and I enjoyed going around during the weekends and when she didn't feel like driving her car, we would simply take the subway to get about." He closed his eyes, distantly remembering his older sister, beckoning for him to follow her into the train car.

He felt a hand on his left one. "You miss her still." She stated soberly.

"Of course I do." He replied. "I loved her very much. She was the only one I had." He bowed his head slightly and sadly. 

She squeezed his hand. "It's alright. I'm sure she's happy up there." She reassured him positively. "I mean, by the way you talk about her, she must be an angel." 

He gave her a small smile. "Nice of you to say that."

"Well," she gave him a nervous chuckle. "Both of us have lost our loved ones, right? In a way, I guess we can relate with one another...I'm sure Raiha's up there with your 'neechan. He died so peacefully, so calmly as if he were never afraid of it." She stated softly. 

"What did he die of?" he asked before he could prevent himself from doing so. 

"Cancer." She said bleakly. "It was terminal. The moment I found out about it, I ran to Yanagi. I begged her to help Raiha and to cure him if she could. She was more than willing, however there were too many risks if she continued with the procedure. Kagero-san had already informed us that Yanagi might lose her life trying to cure the tumor." 

He watched her silently. Hints of sadness were present in her voice, but she continued. 

"I couldn't blame Recca if he refused to let Yanagi do it. I began searching for other methods then. Sadly, there were none. Yanagi could only give him a few more months before the tumor would spread throughout his whole body and kill him." She trembled. "There was really nothing I could do and I felt so helpless at that time..." she trailed off.

It was his turn to press her hand. "I felt the same way when Mifuyu was killed. But listen to me." He shifted his gaze from the dark sky to her eyes. "It wasn't your fault. You couldn't do anything about it even if you tried. Cancer, sadly, still has no cure Fuuko. It was a very ill fated event and I'm really sorry about it. But you should stop blaming yourself." 

"I...I can't help it." 

"You're making yourself miserable in the process." 

She sighed sadly. "Maybe. It's hard, though." 

"It is hard." He agreed. "But you won't gain anything if you don't try." 

"Words of wisdom?" she joked half-heartedly. "I know, I know...I should keep on trying." 

He let go of her hand. "That's better. I know you are." 

"You're not really bad for a confidante, Tokiya." She gave him a small grin.

Tokiya glanced at her pale face and her shivering form. He only noticed it now---it was getting cold. And she was only wearing a simple tank top and jeans. She was rather near to being soaked and the fact that Fuuko had had traces of fever worried him.

He slid off his jean jacket and placed it on her shoulders, leaving him with his black shirt on. She looked at him inquiringly. "What's this for?"

"You're cold." He pointed out, in a matter-of-fact tone. 

"Not really." She said, shrugging. "You should take your jacket back. You might catch something."

Tokiya hailed a cab a few blocks away from them. He turned back to answer her. "I assure you, my resistances are pretty strong. While you, in the mean time are still recovering from a bad cold and fever." He said, reminding her of her previous condition. 

"Gee, all concerned now are we?" she smirked, "I'm fine Tokiya. Why do you worry about me so much? I'm not that delicate you know."

Oh yes you are, and I worry about you, He said silently. "Are you going to waste your time arguing with me again? Because no matter what you do, I'm going to win this round." 

She rolled her eyes, her back on him as she got inside the cab that stopped. "Don't tell me that I have to start another one with you." She said jokingly and leaned back against the cushions. Fuuko didn't bother going all the way to the side---she had always gotten used to sitting in the middle. Since she was a child with her mom and dad at the back. 

He soon got in and shut the door. After giving the driver quick instructions on where to go, he also rested his back and continued saying, "if you don't agree with me, I'll be forced to take you inside my house again. Don't make me do that." 

"I'll bolt out, I swear." 

He rolled his eyes upward. "Whatever you say Kirisawa."

Then both of them were silent. Tokiya was again indulging in his own thoughts by glancing at the dark sky through the window by his side. She, on the other hand was basking in the warmth of the vehicle. It was much better than the cold and wet feeling she had outside. Much as she hated to admit it, but Tokiya's jacket helped her. She was about to freeze back there. She also felt sleepy. All the activity made her exhausted, for some reason.

::Must be the fever::

Damn, he was right again! It irked her slightly, to know that Tokiya was really such a smart and remarkable person. She stole a side-glance at the calm person sitting silently beside her. It was true that in all aspects, he had beaten her. From the fighting skills, to the level of intelligence...hell, even the looks! There were indeed no doubts on Tokiya's handsome and good-looking features. Why, he could actually attract a handful of girls (and even guys, she added giggly to herself) by simply putting a smile on that striking face of his. 

Maybe that was also why a lot of people had been casting momentary looks at the two of them while they were at the mall. ...probably to ogle at the man walking beside her. Fuuko was amused and was even tempted to chuckle because her long haired friend didn't notice a single thing.

::friend?::

Was Tokiya her friend now? She wasn't even inclined to hesitate on admitting that. Of course he was her friend! He helped her, and is still doing so, right? Anyone who helps a person out of concern is considered as a friend/pal/buddy. At least that's what she believes. Of course during the past, she never really thought of Tokiya being a good companion. 

But things were different then. The guy changed a lot. There was big difference with the way he carried himself. Though he retained the same calm and polite demeanor, all the ice and traces of bitterness were gone. Come to think of it, he could almost qualify for being labeled _nice_.

::Almost::

Fuuko grinned mischievously. The guy still had pints of sarcasm coming along every so often. But overall, he wasn't doing so badly. In fact, she was proud of him for overcoming all the obstacles in his life. She was one of the rare people who'd see all the anger and fury expressed within him during the days of the Urabutosatsujin. It was she and Domon who had jumped down to help him after his fall during his battle with Kai. She would never forget the look in his eyes.

The look of wrath and pain. 

She thought he'd never go through with it. He had, after all, disappeared right after the tournament was over. He didn't care to join them in their celebration or the free trip they won. He simply vanished for 3 months without telling anyone. They heard of him a few more months after. She had never really gotten to the point of spending quality time with the guy. Fuuko assumed that the rest of the Hokage welcomed him back warmly. She was too caught up with her own romantic affair. 

::our affair::

She bit her lip. You are not going to start weeping all over again. Not here, she told herself firmly. In her mind, she rapidly tore away from the very memories she had with her loved one and shifted to Yanagi and the rest of the group. People she hadn't seen for a while.

It had only been 3 days, but she missed Yanagi terribly. She missed her best friend, who received the harshest treatment from her. Now that she looked back at it, she had been incredibly unfair back then. She tried to recall the birthday party they tried to celebrate with her. Fuuko winced. She had snapped at Domon, yelled at Yanagi---even expressed her dislike for birthday parties and ungratefulness for all their efforts to cheer her up. 

::You were such a bitch::

She admitted guiltily her faults and mistakes. That day _was_ awful. While she had been moping away at her own problems, she had managed to cause a lot of people a great deal of pain. She nearly punched Mikagami, for God's sake! Mikagami, who also attempted to help her up. 

And he was the only one successful in getting her attention. She threw away the rest of the others' pains to help her out. Man, was she ever grateful to have met a guy as stubborn as she was. Had he not persisted, she might have been gone by now. Her frantic measures with suicide were another part of her misconceptions. Where did he ever get the motivation to save her anyway?

She swung around from her seat to ask him when she saw his dazed look once again. 

::What is that guy thinking about?::

Little did she know that his mind hosted the same question too.

*******

"Thanks, Tokiya. I had fun today."

"Me too." He smiled sincerely. "Now don't do anything stupid, or I'll have your head." He warned her.

"What if I'm already dead by then?" she teased him. 

His narrowed. "Kirisawa..." he started.

She slapped him on the back, hard. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding! Sheesh, lighten up a bit!" 

"Funny how you say that," he frowned at her. "Your intentions were completely different the other day. Maybe I should change my mind and bring you back to my place." 

"I'm not a child Tokiya," she said, her tone changing to a more serious one. "I can take care of myself. I promise not to do anything silly. I'll be calling Yanagi up, err...I wanna talk to her about some things."

His face lightened up. "That's a relief. You should rest first. I'll be going now...call me if you need anything." He said, smiling again at her and giving her light hug. 

She returned the squeeze and waved goodbye as he dodged raindrops, hurrying back to the cab, waiting to take him back to his place. As soon as the car sped off, she turned to the door and fumbled for the keys in her pocket. She found the metal set after a few seconds and opened the door. 

Upon entering the living room of her house, she quickly shrugged off her shoes and jacket and proceeded up to her room to change. She figured that her parents were going to be late since it was already 5:30 pm and there was still no sign of human presence inside the house. Her mom and dad were usually home by this time. She pulled off her clothes and replaced them with a purple shirt and cycling shorts. 

Fuuko went back and checked the answering machine. There was one message from her parents, confirming that they would be late and that they would be stepping out for dinner. With that, she padded towards the kitchen and checked the contents of the ref. She brought out leftovers from her mom's stew and popped it into the microwave. While waiting for it, she moved to the other room and picked up the cordless phone.

*******

Fuuko sat by the den and ate her dinner in silence. The TV had nothing to offer her for tonight so she settled for making herself comfortable on the couch. Outside, the rain poured endlessly but the fireplace had a cheerful blaze roaring. The stew her mom made was full of spices and she sat, nestled among the soft cushions. She stayed there, sipping the broth from the spoon quietly. 

::I wonder if he's okay::

::Huh?::

She laughed out loud at her sudden question. Of course Tokiya's fine. He should be home by now, eating his dinner by himself too. Why the heck is she worrying anyway? She leaned back and let her shoulders relax on the pads, supporting her neck. Tokiya would be fine, she reassured herself. Water is his key element after all. She shouldn't fret about him. 

Her eyes shifted to the phone lying beside her. She had just gotten off the phone with Yanagi a couple of minutes earlier. She also said her apologies. They weren't rejected and in a span of less than a minute, she had her best friend back. 

_"So I saw you and Tokiya-senpai at the mall today" _

_ "Hmm. Yeah. We went around and saw a movie" _

_"Just a movie?" _

_"Yeah. Just a movie." _

_"Okay, if you say so..."_

_"What? Stop giggling Yanagi-chan. What's up with you anyway? You seemed like you had an overdose of mush today."_

_ "...okay, I'll stop. It's just that you make such a cute couple, walking around together like that. I mean, you two looked good together!"_

_"..."_

_"Fuuko-chan?"_

_"..."_

_ "Oh Fuuko-chan, I didn't mean anything. I'm sorry. I know that you and Raiha---"_

_"Yanagi, Tokiya and I aren't going out, okay? He happened to offer to take me out to the mall today. That's it. What made you think of such silly things?"_

_"Well, even Recca pointed it out."_

_"Ah, you guys are weird, you know that?"_

_"I don't mean to imply anything Fuuko-chan...but don't you think it's time to move on?" _

_"What do you mean?"_

_"I mean, move on. I'm not saying that you should forget about Raiha and the memories you've spent with him but you should also try new possibilities. You never know...love might come knocking on your door once more. As a matter of fact, he might be even be the one who's with you right now!"_

_"Are you saying that Tokiya and I will soon end up together? Dream on Yanagi! That's impossible. YOU KNOW that there's no one in this world that would replace Raiha. And besides, me and Tokiya together? You must be crazy. Sure, he's nice, handsome and everything but please! I don't think we'll stand each other for even one month."_

_"You said he was handsome! Isn't that something?"_

_"I'm stating the truth here, Yanagi. And you know our personalities crash."_

_"I don't get you. He's already changed a lot, Fuuko." _

_"I know he's changed...but, it just can't work out Yanagi. It won't work out that way."_

_"Don't you even want to try Fuuko?"_

_"No, Yanagi. It won't work out. Trust me. And hello...I don't think Tokiya is even attracted to me!"_

_"Okay.."_

_"Listen, it's getting really late. I better go. My dinner's getting cold."_

_"Hai. I don't mind. I have to go out too."_

_"With Rekka?"_

_"...h..Hai."_

_"Oh Yanagi, stop that, will you? I can picture you blushing right now..."_

_"Nani? I'm not!"_

A sudden crash sent Fuuko jerking up and nearly spilling the contents of the hot bowl she held on her lap. She glanced at the outside and saw lightning dancing in all its golden glory. Getting up from her cross-legged position from the couch, she walked over to the glass panes and pressed her cheek and palms against the cool glass, feeling the rumbles caused by the storm.

::I wonder...if you're watching me at this very moment::

**Rai – thunder. Fuu – wind. **

Those two elements come together a lot of times especially during this kind of weather, she mused silently. She was never afraid of the stormy nights and the bolts of lightning that would dash through the air. In fact, she loved them. She enjoyed them even more when he was with her. 

Fuuko sighed, moving slowly to the sides and drawing the curtains close. 

::Those times are gone:: 

A tear or two rolled off her cheek as she sadly acknowledged the truth. 

::Goodbye. I'll see you in heaven::

Fuuko moved back to the sofa and sank in it. There was no use in being depressed now. She closed a chapter in her heart and opened a new one. Still, a touch of sadness lingered within her. After all, he had become part of her life. And now she was giving him her last farewells by burying her sadness in the midst of the storm raging on at the outside. 

She felt cold. How come? She recalled not feeling this way a few hours ago. 

::His jacket::

"Oh, right..." she shifted and glanced at the denim jacket, hanging by the doorway. She forgot to return his jacket before he left. No problem. She'd pay him a visit tomorrow and give it back. She'll probably ask a few questions regarding his final good byes to Mifuyu. He'd give her advice. 

Right? He wouldn't mind...right?

Come to think of it, Tokiya did seem to be acting weird the whole day. He was occasionally doing a lot of deep thinking, he would stare at her for no reason, he would act so, so WEIRD. That incident at the movie house nearly set her laughing at the ensui master's blunders. It was such a surprise. He was a near-to-perfection kind of guy and still he looked so nervous and funny that time. 

Fuuko smiled to herself. She'd go to his place tomorrow, return the jacket and tease him about it. 

And get a few answers. 


	6. I'm Falling

Isolation 

**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.**

**A/N: **I'm back people. *checks the last chapter and cringes* I was hoping that it would go well enough. In case any of you don't know, this is actually my first serious Rekka no Honou fic ever. ^^;; I hope that explains my way of writing. Anyway, I do apologize if the chapters are getting boring. It is really, REALLY hard to write about couple and their relationship. Most especially if you're dealing with people who've had traumatic pasts. And it does take time too. I don't want to rush things, so forgive me minna-san! 

I've added my share of the well-awaited mush in this chapter. And just so there's some consolation for those seeking the love scene and everything, **it all happens in the end**. I mean it! The last 2 chapters of this fic have been planned and everything. All you have to do is bear with my silly stuff first. Actually, IMO, it's Tokiya who gets the harder end of things because he's about to realize the cold, harsh reality that Fuuko might never...oops. 'Nuff! I'm giving away things. ^_~ Thanks to the wonderful reviewers! You guys are great!

Any complaints, constructive criticisms and suggestions are all welcome. Feel free to email me at psychic_blizzard@yahoo.com/eistraum@hotmail.com. And without further ado, on with the story. 

**R and R please!** I'd appreciate it if you do!

Chapter 6: I'm falling 

Hours had been spent tossing and turning, kicking the sheets and endless flinging of pillows. It took that long for Tokiya to realize that apparently, he was definitely not going to get any sleep at all that night. Insomnia had taken over his mind and he had tried very hard to get it out since 11 pm. Now it was 3 in the morning and he was starting to get a bit irritated. Though it was a good thing that the following---or rather day, was a public holiday. He'd get a break from school. His present situation was hard enough. This was bad. It would mean not having enough sleep for two nights now. Convinced that Kami would not grant him any rest, he got up and walked over to his kitchen. 

He slowly prepared himself a cup of tea. He opened the shelf a few inches from him and ran a finger through the boxes containing tea bags of all sorts of flavors. There were numerous selections, actually. The 17 year old preferred tea to beer and the other drinks people his age would usually enjoy. An occasional soda would suit him but most of the time, he drank plain water and tea-hot or cold. He finally settled on jasmine and took it out. 

The steaming cup on his hand brought warmth to him and the sweet-smelling aroma kept his senses awake. Outside, the hard drumming of raindrops was heard. Rain fell on the street and thunder rumbled on. It sent a chill towards his room but inside, he was warm and relaxed. Having nothing else to do, he decided to remain seated there, listening to the downpour. In a few hours, the sun would be up. But whether the weather would remain the same, he could not tell. He didn't have any problems with the rain, anyway. He loved it, albeit he would rather watch it from afar. There were days in his childhood when he would step out and soak himself, relishing in the cold and the wet feeling.

He took a sip and felt the hot liquid trickle down his throat. What now? He stifled a yawn. His whole body was aching for sleep but his mind would not rest. The smell of jasmine filled a small portion of the room. He was faintly reminded of Fuuko. 

He recalled, during their near collision at the subway, inhaling the scent of her hair. It smelled like fresh, wildflowers blossoming in the outskirts of Tokyo. It was bubbly, happy and easy. That was Fuuko Kirisawa. Her austere self was jovial but she was yet a puzzle. Something he couldn't quite figure out. Unlike ordinary girls, whom he could classify with the blink of an eye, she was different. She haunted his mind, her actions kept him wondering and her eyes had managed to cast spell, rendering him defenceless and lost. 

"Fuuko..." he whispered.

Could it be? Was he...

**No. You can't.** He reminded himself. Again, he told himself firmly that his motives were to help her with her traumatic ordeal. He was to be a friend, someone to comfort her in her time of need. That was all. Simple. Nothing else. Now that he looked at it, his actions reflected that of an older brother and not that of someone crushing on her. 

Crush?

The mere 5-letter word sent him to the world of confusion. Not again, he groaned. It can't be! It just can't. He survived 3 months without seeing the Hokage and not once did he recall ever missing their presence. He was a loner, by nature. Why the sudden longing for others' presence now? This couldn't be happening. He hadn't felt this way since Mifuyu died. After she left, all emotions and feelings escaped him. This was just so...strange.

**Think Tokiya.**

He was thinking. And so far, this was what his mind brought him. Not a headache, not a dizzy spell, but random thoughts of a girl who he spent the whole day with. Maybe that was it. He spent too much time with her, and so she was stuck in his mind. Could that be possible?

No. There had to be another answer. 

He found himself comparing this to another chemistry class and him trying to find the formula of the combined mixture of sodium hydroxide and other bases hanging about. What was the technique he used? **Examine, experiment, and conclude. **He did that alright. He examined his present thoughts and feelings, he experimented with them and tested them...exploring all the sides and angles. But did he come up with any conclusion? 

This isn't science class. It's all about human relationships. 

He needed someone to help him with this. 

**Who? **

Definitely not Fuuko. He had to find someone. He couldn't contact his spiritual adviser at the moment. Not even Mifuyu. He had taken to asking her about this, but no answer came to him. Just blankness. It left him perplexed and agitated. The ensui master was used to finding solutions within 5 minutes of careful analysis and precise observations. What was happening now? He could not even get something logical out of what he was doing. 

Kami-sama, I beg you to give me an answer. I'll go insane. 

******

"Coming!" he half-yelled, after hearing the doorbell ring. Who would be visiting him at this time of the day anyway? He placed his plates inside the dishwasher and padded over to the door. He reached over for the knob and opened it. 

**Please let it be...**

She was standing there in front of him. The very girl, who kept him from sleeping that very night, had appeared in front of his doorway. "Ohayo!" she greeted him cheerfully.

"Ohayo." He managed to say. "What are you doing here?"

She lifted a paper parcel and handed it to him.

"What's this?"

"It's your jacket." She answered. "I um, forgot to give it back to you yesterday, remember? So here it is. I put it in the washing machine and dryer overnight. Thanks for lending it to me. I kept me warm. And guess what, my cold's gone now!" 

"Oh. Okay. You're welcome." He nodded politely, peeking inside the paper bag. Inside lay his jacket, neatly folded and pressed. He looked up again and found himself staring at her for a while. She was looking exceptionally attractive today as she was sporting a simple blue blouse and a dark, black denim skirt. Since when did she start wearing clothes like that? If he could remember correctly, Fuuko was the tomboy between her and Yanagi. He always saw her in shorts or pants and plain shirts---anything she was comfortable fighting in. But now? She nearly took his breath away. 

They stood there, staring at each other silently as time passed. 

"Um..." she fidgeted nervously.

He was staring at her. Again. Damn those eyes! Say something, he urged himself. 

"Care to stay for a while?" was what he could muster. He tore himself from her eyes, her features and opened the door a bit wider. "I take that you came for something else." He noted, as the girl readily stepped in. 

"Well, I was kinda hoping to ask you some things..." 

Oh no. His mind panicked. Did she notice his odd behavior yesterday? How on earth will he explain that if he himself could not even answer? A quick flood of questions went through his brain and most of them were already beyond reasoning.

"You look terrible, Mi-chan. Something happen?" she asked, concerned as she peered at his tired face and worrisome eyes. "You look like there was a ghost in here."

"I'm okay." He shook it off, offering her a smile. "Do you want anything?" he indicated to his refrigerator, trying to change the subject. Hopefully, she wouldn't detect anything.

She shook her head. "I just had breakfast with the group. I was trying to call you up, but no one was answering. It figures, though. Seems like the storm affected the phone lines around your place. Recca told me all about it." 

"Maybe." He acknowledged. "How is everyone then?"

"Oh, they're fine. I apologized to them and everything. I even explained that you were helping me. We had fun. Wished you were there, though. It would have been livelier."

"I doubt that." He responded dryly, taking a seat beside her on his couch.

She playfully slapped his back. "You're silly, you know that? Come on now, everyone was anxious to see you again. And they wouldn't reject you, seeing that you've changed and all..." she giggled, but then her tone changed as she noticed the silver haired boy pale and appearing a bit weak. "Hey...are you sick or something?"

"Huh?" He glanced at her. "No, I couldn't sleep last night. Insomnia or something. But I do feel a bit terrible right now." He admitted. He woke up on the couch not feeling himself that morning. After checking his watch, it seemed as if he only had 3-4 hours of rest. He had managed to get himself a bit to eat but his eyes were playing tricks on him and he felt hot, even though a moderate drizzle persisted outside. 

Fuuko placed her small hand on his forehead. "You are a bit warm." She observed. "I think you have the flu." She concluded. 

Ugh. He felt like crawling back in bed. But not when she was around. "I'm okay." He insisted. "It's probably a simple cold or something. It'll blow away." She was right, again. Not only did he wake up feeling bad, he also started with a cold, was coughing and was extremely dizzy. He rarely got sick. As far as he was concerned, his vital systems were always healthy. The rain had somehow gotten to him.

"No, you're not." She told him. "Want to go back to bed?"

He shook his head, but found himself losing balance in spite of his being seated. Tokiya was about to lean towards the floor when he felt her arms encircle his and pull him towards her. He raised a hand to his forehead and gently pressed on his throbbing temples. 

Fuuko pulled him over to her lap. "Here, why don't you lie down on me for a while?" she offered gently. "You really do look sick." 

He let her draw him to her lap and he lay his head down gently. He closed his eyes, shifting slightly to a more comfortable position. "This is just great you know..." he muttered. "I'm at your mercy for the moment. I think I even got this from you." He joked. 

"Yeah, it was my fault." She said, her tone sober. "Gomen ne."

Alarmed that she took his teasing tad too seriously, he quickly replied. "I was just joking, Fuuko." He told her. "Don't act all guilty about it." 

"If only you didn't give me your jacket, then you'd be warmer." She insisted, recalling the fact that she saw Tokiya go back, nearly soaked and she was protected from the elements. How stupid! She should have invited him inside instead of having him go back home in that rain. "I'm sorry about this." Fuuko apologized again. "I should have returned your jacket." 

"It's okay." He reassured her, eyes still closed. "I'll be fine. I'm not dying anyway." 

She smiled, despite her guilty admission. "Here, let me make it up to you." She said, as she brought her fingers to his face and started massaging his temples gently. "I do this all the time for Ganko and Yanagi." 

"That feels nice." He muttered, feeling the pains diminish little by little as his muscled began to loosen up a bit. "But it's also embarrassing."

"What?" 

He opened his eyes and looked at her curious ones seriously. "If Recca or anyone else finds out that I'm being cared for and massaged by a girl like you, I'll never hear the end of it." 

"Didn't Mifuyu do this for you, when you were sick?" she asked, trying to suppress laughter. 

"Yeah, she did actually. She'd make me soup, give me a mug of chocolate milk and everything else. But after she died, I looked after myself. I was forced to," he said, not taking his eyes of her. "At an early age, I had to learn how to balance accounts our deceased parents left us, I had to learn how to cook and do things for myself. My teachers at school would take turns looking after me but as soon as I turned 13, I decided to do things my way. Alone. Worst of all, I subconsciously threw away my emotions with everything else."

She listened to his change of tone, stroking the strands of hair gently. "Gee, mi-chan...I knew that Mifuyu died and all...I didn't know you were that alone." 

"I was." 

The pain in his voice and the sadness in his eyes caused Fuuko the shock and realization that Tokiya, though he appears and seems to be older, mature, and calm might be just a frightened boy underneath. Seeing him with his eyes closed reminded her of the innocent boy he would tell her about. The same boy who lost his sister at a tender age. He had such a bright future before him, but the incident that caused his nightmares brought him to the troubles that plagued his mind.

"And to think," he added angrily, "that bastard Meguri Kyoza, actually encouraged me to become a heartless killer. He told me to throw away all of what's left in my heart. He said that it would make me weak, it would make me a sissy, it would prevent me from finding my sister's killer and disposing of him effectively. If only I had known..." 

"Ssshh." She hushed him softly. "Tokiya, that was the past, remember? Those days are gone. The Urabutousatsujin, your lessons with Meguri Kyoza, everything...that was the past. You can't do anything about it anymore."

"But Fuuko," he continued. His voice was reduced to a whisper. "They...he...took everything I loved. Everything that was important to me. He managed to ruin my life and that of my sister's. We were living contentedly by ourselves. I don't know what brought him to use my sister's death as a trigger for my potential with the blasted ensui. He could have found someone else to torture. Why me? Was it because I deserved all that?" his voice trailed off. There was an unfamiliar feeling of wetness in his eyes.

Was he crying?

This was new. He never cried. He brought his hand to wipe them away but her fingers gently brushed over his eyes. 

"I guess we both have a problem with letting go." 

He nodded silently; absent-mindedly letting her wipe his eyes while her other hand slowly caressed his cheek. "I never knew there'd be so many similarities between us." She continued saying. "I mean, when I first met you, it would never cross my mind that we would actually be here, opening up to each other and everything." 

"You know what? I felt the same way." He admitted. "I thought of you as some reckless tomboy who knew nothing about life or the pains of humanity..."

"And you were just some stuck-up guy who's obsessed with revenge." Fuuko replied teasingly.

True enough, he said to himself. Everyone saw him as that. Cold, silent, sarcastic...what more? He was an ice block there was no doubting that. He refused human contact; he shrugged off people who were trying to make friends with him...No wonder 7 years of his life was spent being miserable. Yet, here he was. Telling her things only the 4 walls of his room heard. It was a new experience for him, but damn, he'd been hiding these feelings for so long already! He wondered whether it was Kami-sama's will for him to surprisingly unlock all of it now. 

He felt his face grow warm as Fuuko continued massaging his head. His headache had gone away, miraculously. She was just so close to him! He had to know why this was happening...why she was being so kind to him, why she suddenly became soft and gentle with a man who never treated her equally until the present times...

He had to ask.

"Why are you doing this?" 

"Why am I doing what?" she asked, looking at him.

He stared into those pools of blue again. He was willing to risk being captured, if it meant knowing the answer. "I don't deserve this Fuuko. After the many times I've harshly rebuked you and the rest of the Hokage...I don't know why you still put up with me. Heck, even Yanagi. She's been so kind to me even when I left, when I was cold. And now you're actually..."

She touched his hand. "Because you managed to pull me up when I was down. When I was drowning, you saved my life and made sure that I would still live. Because you were the only one who understood me...and everyone deserves friendship, Mikagami. Whether you're the coldest or the unhappiest man on earth. You can't stay isolated from the rest of us forever. Believe it or not, we've grown into a family because of the UBS. And families stick together, right?" she smiled, squeezing his hand warmly. "I know Mifuyu's death caused you so much anger and anguish. But there are others here who are willing to offer you the comfort that you long for."

So that was it. Somehow, his pain was eased. A small voice inside him reassured his hungry soul that he was loved---in one way or another. If here, he had no relatives or family, he had them. Yanagi and the rest...they were there. Just waiting for him. He was the loner, the aloof member of the team. How stupid could he have been back then? It was his foolish pride that had kept him from being closer to them. Perhaps now...would they give him a second chance?

Those eyes caught him once more. Those blue orbs filled with gentleness and understanding. And he was led to believing that 2nd chances weren't that hard to achieve. They spoke out loud to him. The same pair of Prussian blue that managed to capture his mind and soul. His hand covered hers. "Then let me say that I appreciate everything you've given me. Everything you've said to make me feel better despite my wrong doings. Yet, still I feel that I don't deserve to be held by such an angel..." he whispered, both hands clasping hers.

::What's going on here?::

Fuuko felt her heart skip a beat when he uttered those lines. Her hand was caught in between his and try as hard as she might, she could not stop herself from blushing. She wasn't supposed to be blushing though. But when she saw his eyes with a look she could not decipher, she immediately knew that she was lost. The pale blue eyes, the fair skin, the silver locks of hair...

And he called her an **angel**? 

Stop being silly Fuuko, she scolded herself. Yet, she found herself drawing closer to him...he was pulling her nearer. Nearer to his face, which held an expression she had never seen before...nearer to his lips. Her mind had taken off, all logic was gone and she could do nothing but close her eyes and anticipate the surreal moment her heart was awaiting. 

"Fuuko-chan?"

She jerked away at once. So did he, trying to sit up quickly but his current condition still left him unstable. Fuuko immediately placed her hand under his neck to support him, lest he should fall. She brought her head up to see where the voice of the new comer came from. Seconds ago, their lips were that close to contact and now it was broken for someone had come. A mixture of disappointment and relief greeted her as she felt her mind tumble into a faint miasma.

"Yanagi-chan? What are you doing here?" she found her voice at last, asking the longhaired maiden who stared at them fixatedly.

The latter had a look that plainly said, _Funny, I was about to ask you the same thing_. "I was going to check up on Tokiya-kun. But um..." she trailed off, indicating that she was not necessarily needed as she knew that the two were obviously keeping each other company.

"I'm okay Yanagi-san." Fuuko at last heard him speak. There was no sign of embarrassment or nervousness in his voice in spite of what the young healer had seen. "I just caught the flu, that's all." She had to hand it to him. He was an excellent actor, after all.

She was still holding him, and he was still physically close to her. Fuuko was sure that Yanagi was now coming up with all sorts of conclusions. She wished with all her might that the girl would not elaborate on each and every detail later on. 

"You have the flu, Tokiya-sempai?" Yanagi went over to them worriedly. "It is pretty high," she mumbled, running her hand across the swordsman's forehead. "Would you like me to cure you right now?" she offered him.

He nodded. "That would be better. I was suffering from a headache and was extremely dizzy."

Yanagi smiled at him. "Don't worry. I'll have it finished in no time."

As Yanagi bent over and began the healing process, Fuuko was stuck there on the couch, seated as Mikagami was still lying on her lap. He was a bit weak to stand or sit up on his own so Yanagi had suggested that he lay down and relax while she took the time to push the bacteria from his body away. For the mean time, Fuuko could do nothing but keep her hands together, to prevent them from fidgeting. She was having the hardest time, trying to avoid turning a deeper shade of red than she already was. 

Just what had transpired between the two of them moments ago? He was telling her more about his past and his hardships and she comforted him to the best of her ability. She saw another side of Tokiya then. She saw an innocent boy, scared, frightened and angry. He revealed another aspect of himself to her and she was sure that no one else knew about it. The mere fact that she could see tears streaming down the silver-haired bishounen shocked her and most of all, saddened her. So that was what he was hiding from them all this time. The pain, the anguish and the guilt of not having protected the one he loved the most. Never in her life had she seen Tokiya in that state. He looked so helpless and desperate.

Just like her when she lost Raiha.

Fuuko was positive that she made no mistake in saying that they both had a lot of similarities. They were both lonely, and had lost a loved one. Hers was more recent but what difference did it make? After all these years, Mikagami still had a hard time forgetting about his sister. She still blamed herself for not being able to help Raiha. It was only until then that she had started her 'therapy'. 

And the next thing she knew was that she was being pulled close and near to kissing him. A few seconds before Yanagi made her appearance felt. What was that? Suddenly, she was being drawn to him? How could that be happening? She shook her head furiously. It was probably a spur of the moment then. But those eyes, the look on the face he had...

It was unforgettable. 

"Finished." Yanagi said, interrupting her thoughts. "Are you feeling better now?" she asked Tokiya while standing up and brushing her dress.

"Much better, Yanagi-san. Arigatou gozaimashita." Tokiya nodded politely thanking her. He carefully rose up and stood on his feet. "It's nice to know that that persistent headache disappeared. I thought I would have to spend the next few days taking care of myself here at home." 

"I'm sure you wouldn't have to. Besides, Fuuko would be here to help you, ne?"

Fuuko felt the temperature rise up her face for a split second before giving Yanagi a slight glare. She didn't notice however, that the ensui wielder also had tinges of pink around his cheeks too, well hidden by the angle of his face. Both were quiet for a while, not knowing what to say when Yanagi finally broke the silence. 

"Well, now that Tokiya-sempai's flu is gone, I was about to ask if you two would care to join Recca and I for a stroll in the park? The sun's up, thankfully, and we were both thinking that it would be nice if you decided to come along. Tokiya-kun did miss the breakfast we had this morning, ne?" she asked, with her sweet smile. 

"I wouldn't mind..." Fuuko began, giving Tokiya a short glance. "The weather has improved a lot." She noted the halting drizzle and the shy sun peeking from the vast clouds.

He agreed, silently nodding his head. "Why not?"

******

Baka, baka, baka! 

What in the world possessed him to do that stupid thing? 

He was near to punching himself in annoyance. He was a fool. A real dumb one, at that. To actually draw her near and let his senses take over when the door was left open? Yanagi-san caught him/them. The look on her face was unmistakable too. Surprise, disbelief and unless his eyes were playing tricks on him, **mischief**. He had not known Yanagi's face for showing such but he saw it with his very own eyes. She actually looked delighted, though it was mixed with confusion and shock. What did she think of them now? Tokiya was no fool. He knew that any blundering idiot that would stray inside his apartment would know that something was going on.

Was she mad at him for taking advantage of her?

Hopefully not. She didn't even seem to protest. What did that mean? 

He messed things up. What an idiot! He yelled inwardly on and on throughout the whole period. He wasn't paying attention to anything at the moment. All he knew was that he had recently exposed his vulnerable side to a girl who confused him, and that he nearly kissed her. And after all that, Yanagi appeared and caught the two of them in a prominent position that would give away the term: **lovers**.

Then again, maybe it was a good thing Yanagi showed up. If it continued, if he did kiss her, what would happen next? Would she get mad at him for doing so?

He was too caught up with his thoughts to notice the girl beside him. Apparently, she was thinking the same way. 

**Just give me an explanation, will you?**

Yanagi had taken notice of the two teenagers walking behind Recca and her. She chuckled secretly to herself and she took hold of Recca's hand, whispering to him a few, well chosen words. Her boyfriend immediately gave her a look of pure surprise, which then on turned to glee and excitement. Good. He was just as into this as she is.

How are you sure it would work? He mouthed to her.

She gave him her sweetest, most innocent smile, which proved ironic for the plan they were commencing. It was too perfect. After catching the two that morning, a plan had instantly registered into her mind and she was determined to make it work. It would be good for the two of them, especially Fuuko who was looking so dense and the other so troubled.

They looked so cute. She giggled quietly, and shortly after, received a small poke from Recca. She promised to quiet down as she whispered the directions discreetly to her faithful ninja, who decided to help her out with her newly laid scheme.

******

::Thank Kami, it's empty::

Fuuko nearly sprang to the swing set of the park. She sat on her favorite one, just under a big sakura tree. Too bad it wasn't in full bloom yet. It was spring, and the blossoms were just starting to grow. Still, she was there for the comfort of the good old swing and not the tree. As soon as she properly adjusted her skirt, she kicked off and began reaching towards the sky. Fortunately, the rain decided to halt its activity and hid for a while to make room for the sun to shine. It felt nice; the air for it was crisp and cold...not hot or humid. It was perfect for her.

Just as she was starting to enjoy herself, she felt someone pass behind her. She gave a quick glance to her back and saw Tokiya retreating over to a small marble seat by another tree a few meters away. She was puzzled at his behavior. She didn't get to see his face---only his back and she wondered whether the ensui wielder was angry with her.

"Hey, there." A gentle voice greeted her from the behind and began pushing her.

"Oh, hello." She responded immediately erasing Tokiya from her thoughts and staring at the sky before her.

Yanagi continued pushing her gently. "So...what's up with the two of you now?"

Rather surprised at the straightforward question, Fuuko frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean Fuuko. I wasn't blind. I saw the two of you, and you know that very well."

"That? Hey...were you spying on us the whole time, then?" she asked.

Yanagi laughed. "Of course not, Fuuko-chan. Like I said, I was walking by to check on Tokiya-kun this morning. I saw that the door was a bit open so I pushed it some more and eventually walked into you two. Don't change the subject please, and humor me. What you were doing seemed interesting. Mind on giving me tips?" she asked, teasingly.

"Yanagi!" Fuuko exclaimed, indignantly. "How could you? You know Tokiya and I weren't doing anything! What has gotten into that head of yours?"

"Fuuko," Yanagi giggled, "I'm kidding you, okay? But really now, why do you sound so defensive then? I mean, if it were nothing, then why am I imagining my best friend to be blushing up to now? I assure you, she was pretty good at it for I saw her an hour ago."

"I am not blushing!" she protested. "There's nothing going on between me and Tokiya. Cut that out. That thing that you saw earlier was just a..."

"Delusion?" Yanagi cut in, hopefully.

Boy, I wish it were then. Fuuko muttered inwardly. "No, Yanagi..." she sighed exasperatedly. "To tell you the truth, I don't know what it was." She confessed.

"If I may say so..." the young healer put in carefully, "I think it was an outward result of mutual attraction, don't you think so?" 

Fuuko coughed. "Mu...mutual attraction? You must be kidding me. Who said I was attracted to him? And for kami's sake, haven't we discussed this before? How can Tokiya ever be attracted to me? That's kinda strange. If you ask me, it might be you who's having the delusion."

"If he wasn't attracted to you, then why was he about to kiss you and vice versa?" Yanagi posed.

She stopped dead right then and there. Fuuko opened her mouth to answer back but nothing came out. There was nothing to say. Yanagi got her, and she was right. She sat there, swinging blankly as her mind raced on and on with different questions, assumptions and nervous thoughts on a particular teenager with long silver hair. 

"I...I..." she began, stammering. "I don't know, Yanagi. I don't know." She shook her head sadly. "This can't be happening. I...He knows about Raiha and I. He knew that Raiha died and that it was hard for me. He knows that I still love Raiha until now...it just can't be."

"It is happening Fuuko, whether you like it or not." Yanagi confirmed gently, halting the motion of the swing and holding the purple-haired girl's shoulders in place. "There's no denying it, right? Stop fooling yourself."

"Yanagi, no matter what happens, all of you know that Raiha will forever and only be the one who'd be able to make me happy! You know that!" she said desperately, her confusion taking over. 

"Aren't you even willing to try, dear?"

::Get a hold on yourself Fuuko::

She shook her head again, this time firm. She promised Raiha to try and get over it, but not over him. "No. What you saw was just a mistake. That's all it was. Mikagami and I are _friends_ and nothing more. We'll never be anything more. Please get it through your head. I'll talk to him later, by myself and sort things out." A note of finality was present.

It was Yanagi's turn to sigh. It was harder than she thought. She hadn't anticipated that Fuuko would be this tough, this stubborn still. The girl was evidently in love with Raiha until now even though the man was dead. Why, though? Was it that hard to let go of love? Yanagi couldn't blame Fuuko, herself not even knowing how'd she react if her Recca left her. 

And how could she refuse Mikagami? The guy was good-looking, smart, witty, and most of all, kind and gentle. Though his exterior in the past did not show it, Yanagi knew her guts were correct. He wasn't that bad. And he was falling for Fuuko! Most girls would kill for just 10 minutes to spend alone with the bishounen. It's not everyday that you'd see Tokiya Mikagami with his eyes set on a girl. It was the perfect chance, and it was ruined because Fuuko had this problem with letting go.

Yanagi bit her lip. "I'm sorry, Fuuko-chan. I just thought it would be good for you."

She heard the fuujin master exhale loudly. "Yanagi, you may know what's best for me most of the time, but not all the time. This is my own fight; let me battle it by myself. I'll run to you if I need healing, but I ask you to let me do this. I need to figure it out first. Okay?"

"Hai." Yanagi nodded. She couldn't do anything about it at the moment. She began pushing Fuuko again and both of them enjoyed the solitary moment. She could probably try Tokiya later, however her friend would be talking to the guy. She sighed once more. The only thing to do now was to hope that things turn out right. But with the way things are going, Mikagami being so restrained and Fuuko being so mulish, it was impossible that the two would end up as a perfect couple. 

"Those two need to be pinched in order to move..." she mumbled softly.

"huh?" Fuuko asked. "You saying something Yanagi?"

A smile found its way to Yanagi's lips. "Nope." She answered quickly. 

******

Great. What do I do now?

There was no way he was going over to her at this moment. Not when Yanagi's there. They were probably laughing at him. Or she might be mocking him. He saw her lips moving and Yanagi's mouth was full of bubbly laughter. There was no denying it; he was dumb when it came to these matters. Ask him a question on world history, he'd answer within a snap. Tell him to solve complex calculus on the blackboard and he'd have it faster than any man in school. But ask him about a girl?

He would end up stammering, red and blank.

Tokiya sighed and put a hand to his face. This was hopeless. There was no way he'd be able to get anything as close as a smart guess on how/why women act in different habits. He never meant to take advantage of her. It just that she...well, damn! She was just so captivating and he couldn't resist. How would he put it into words? His mind had gone blank at that moment, his senses took over his practicality and all was lost as soon as he ventured into the depths of her being.

It was just so surreal, he couldn't define what he was feeling.

"Oi, Mikagami..."

He looked up and saw the face of Recca's peering over his. This was perfect timing. He never mentioned needing a sea monkey to help him with his personal distress. "Hi. What are you doing here, Hanabishi?" he asked tiredly.

"I was going to ask you the same thing." Recca grinned lopsidedly. "Is that seat there taken, by any chance?" he asked, pointing to the empty space beside the quiet man.

"I have a feeling it's about to be." He replied dully. 

The younger man plopped down eventually after snickering for 2 minutes. "So, is there any problem? You're looking pretty glum today for your usual passive self. Care to tell me?" 

Tokiya gave him a strange look. "Why should I?"

"Uhh...because you're my friend? And friends help each other, right?" 

He gave out another small sigh. "I guess...but this is personal Hanabishi. I can't let you know. I'd rather deal with it by myself. I appreciate your concern...but..."

"This doesn't have anything to do with a girl, ne?" Recca hinted.

Mikagami frowned. "What is this, a set-up?" 

A look of nervousness took toll on Recca's face. "Err...no. What made you think that anyway?"

Tokiya narrowed his eyes. "What do you take me for then? Stupid? I'm not like that Hanabishi. I saw you and Yanagi whispering on the way here. And I have a good idea on what she was telling you. If you'd like to know, there's nothing, absolutely nothing, going on between Kirisawa and me. If you're here to match us up, nice try but it won't work." 

Rather taken aback by the grim face and curt warnings, Recca widened his eyes. "Okay, sure. I knew you'd figure it out even before I say something." He admitted. "Yanagi wanted me to coax you into talking to Fuuko because for some strange reason, hime is excited with the pairing..."

"What pairing?" Tokiya asked annoyed, but knew the answer was coming somehow.

"You and Fuuko."

He rolled his eyes. "Shit, Hanabishi. This thing is getting on my nerves. First Fuuko, now Yanagi. What do you guys want me to do with her anyway?"

"With Fuuko?"

The silver haired man closed his eyes, drawing long and deep breaths before opening his mouth to answer Recca. It was getting to be irritating. He wanted to get out, to be alone, to escape this. However things weren't that easy. Now the pesky ninja was on his trail and he didn't even know what to do with Fuuko. He wanted to talk to her, to explain to her...but explain what? Rubbish?

Why couldn't he explain what was happening?

That sole moment with her...alone, before Yanagi came...it brought back everything. The scent of her violet locks, the arcane eyes and her personality that could match that of an angel. He called her an angel. He never thought the day would come when he'd change her label from tomboy to angel. It was usually reserved for Yanagi, whose kindness overcame any impossible problem. Things were different now. He saw her, not as a playful monkey, but as something else...

**Is this what you call love?**

He didn't know. He was still confused. He needed help. From someone with experience. Tokiya glanced at the flame caster sitting beside him and waiting expectantly for his answer. Bingo. Maybe this guy could help him, knowing his relationship with Yanagi. 

"Tell me, Recca..." he began, but hesitated. He inhaled and exhaled once more. "When you first met Yanagi, how did you feel about her?"

"Naze?" It was Recca's turn to be confused.

"Just answer my question, please."

"Ookay." Recca shrugged. "Well, it was something I really couldn't describe. I just met her one day and the next thing I knew, I was drawn to her."

"How?"

"When I saw her with those kids, when she healed me after I saved her...I just, well...why do you want to know anyway?" the flame caster paused and stared at his former teammate. "Is this some kind of interrogation? Listen, if you're going to do one of those Q&A about us, I'd be happy to tell you that we're doing fine. We've fought and everything, but it works out fine so you don't have to slash me or anything."

Mikagami laughed. "No, you don't have to worry about me, having to kill you." He started to loosen up a bit. "You already know my problem, don't you?" he asked, a tad more seriously this time.

"Mmhmm."

"I don't know how I feel about it. I don't get it."

The Hokage leader halted briefly. "You're in love with her." He finally said, looking up at Mikagami. The latter was staring at him, with his mouth parted slightly. Speechless and eyes wide open, Recca would have found the whole picture funny if things weren't that intense.

"You're saying that I'm in love with her?" he repeated, blankly.

"Well, your symptoms are pretty obvious."

"What symptoms?"

"You're thinking of Fuuko, right?" Recca asked.

"...hai. You could say so."

"You enjoy spending time with her too."

"As a friend, well I'm supposed to, right? Well, yes again." He agreed.

"And you nearly kissed her for no damned reason, am I correct?"

A few moments of silence pursued before Mikagami nodded slowly. 

Recca shrugged again. "Well, there you go. There's your proof. What are you going to do about it now that you've finally realized that you're attracted to my childhood friend?"

"I have no idea." He replied, indecisively. "This can't be. You know, I can't be in love with Fuuko. There's got to be a reason why I'm acting like this, why I'm feeling this way...there's got to be some logical explanation---"

"You know what your problem is, Mikagami?" Recca cut in.

"What?"

"You've put too much reasoning into this whole thing. That's the problem with you. You're too serious about everything. I know you're tired of hearing the same line over and over again, but lighten up man! Since the days of UBS, you were that rulebook person and up to now, you're still finding the reason for love? You can't explain what goes on when you're in love. It just happens. Trust me. There's no logical explanation, as you put it, because love is a feeling. You can't explain emotions. So do yourself a favor and stop trying to figure out this thing. It will give you the headaches, I assure you and in the end, you really won't get a single decent motive."

Half stunned at the rather, wordy talk of Hanabishi, Tokiya had no choice but to listen to him. Was that it, then? That was all? He was in love with Kirisawa Fuuko? Maybe Recca was right. So many sleepless night had been spent just trying to figure out what lured him into her. Maybe there was no logic when it came to this feeling. But what was he going to do now? Approach Fuuko and tell her outright that he was head over heels for her?

She'd laugh at him, she wouldn't believe a single word he'd say. Heck, he wasn't quite sure that he was believing what Recca just told him. Love was an alien word to him now. He threw it away with the rest of the emotions he used to have when Mifuyu died. It was only now that things were coming back. How was he ever going to deal with this?

"Trust me, Mikagami. You're in love with her." Recca plainly stated, reading his thoughts.

He gave up. 

"So maybe I am." He heaved a sigh. "Look, it wasn't supposed to be this way. I was supposed to help her because during that time when I met her, she was suicidal, depressed and every negative emotion was spilling out. But she's changed so quickly, that it's hard to believe that I actually contributed to her happiness. It just happened. I was irritated and clueless on how to help her at first and the next thing I know, I was..." he trailed off. 

"After knowing Fuuko these years, trust me. She was able to recover because you pushed her in the correct way. If it had been me or Yanagi or heck, Domon," Recca shuddered a bit, jokingly, "she'd still be stuck in the islands of despair. And you were falling for her? Well, let me say that I was a bit taken aback, knowing you and our previous experiences...but it's nothing out of the ordinary. I have to agree with my hime that you two do look like an interesting pair to match up."

"Do something silly and I will have your neck." Tokiya threatened him. "I've seen too much matchmaker schemes in my class and none of them work out correctly." 

"Relax, man." Recca playfully punched him. "I didn't agree to that part. I told Yanagi that she should expect two archenemies if I ever tried my hand at it. I promised to talk to you, that's all. It's up to you now, what are you going to do about it?"

"Shut my mouth and keep quiet for the rest of my life." Tokiya replied sourly.

"Nani? Why on kami-sama's name are you going to do that now, huh?" Recca asked incredulously.

"Have you forgotten one thing Hanabishi? Or did Raiha's death seem to slip through that thick skull of yours?" Tokiya sarcastically said, rolling his eyes.

"Raiha? But I thought she was over that..."

"Apparently not." He informed him. "One thing you guys should keep in mind is that it's not easy to let go of a loved one. Fuuko's still has problems letting go of those memories, though she tries not to show it. Hope that answers your question."

"How would you know? You haven't even tried telling her how you feel."

Tokiya bowed his head slightly, letting silver tendrils fall past his ear. It took him a few moments, staring at his hands, fingers interlaced with one another. Was he willing to tell her? How could he anyway? She'd reject him. What's the use? He would rather not spend his time worry about how she would react to him. He knew the answer anyway. "No, Hanabishi. I'm not going to tell her."

"You're not even going to take the possibility? You never know, I mean..."

A firm shake of the head told Recca that he wouldn't be getting anything from the man.

He couldn't tell her. Not now, not ever. He wasn't willing to take any chances. He was a risk taker, in nature but the circumstances were different now. He wasn't in a battle arena, gambling his life for Yanagi's sake. Fuuko wouldn't understand. She was too busy. She loved **Raiha**. Would there be space left in her heart for him? Most probably none. Still, he couldn't keep himself from wondering, but reality hurts and this one had already struck him square on the face. 

He wasn't willing to risk getting hurt again. The prices were too high now.


	7. Irony and Lies

Isolation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.**

**A/N: **Back again after so long. Forgive me, minna-san. I've had this really troublesome cough. It kinda took away my inspiration along with my willpower to continue this fic. This is the second to the last chapter of Isolation. You won't have to put up with me anymore. ^^;; Anyway, this chapter will keep you guys hanging. [Ack, I spoiled it. Well, you know what to expect now. Please don't hit the back button yet!] Sorry in advance, but this is how I really planned it to be. Thank you for all the reviews --- you guys encourage me to write better. 

BTW, this is **really** off topic, but I just started a new fic. Shame on me, I know. I couldn't resist writing. ^^ Anyway, it would keep me busy after finishing Isolation. It's all about Tokiya the vampire and Fuuko, granddaughter of a slayer. Pretty cool. I can't wait to finish this one so I can get working on that. ^^;; I can't write two fics at the same time. It wouldn't be pretty, if I did try.

I'll stop rambling now, and you guys can sue me for wasting your Internet time by emailing me. [I believe I gave out my email in the previous chapter] R&R please!

Chapter 7: Irony and Lies 

"Hello!" Fuuko bounced into the room, without waiting for his greeting.

Tokiya cocked an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"What?" Fuuko returned his look with a small giggle. "I decided to drop in. I mean, Yanagi and Recca are out, as usual...Domon is busy teaching Ganko soccer and Kaoru has his basketball practice. All their activities seem boring to me, so I thought I could crash by your place and uh...bond."

"Bond?" he repeated.

She nodded. "Anything wrong with that? Bond. It means two or more people spend quality time together and have fun. Don't tell me Mifuyu didn't teach you that." She giggled, looking at him. But seeing his expressionless face, she cleared her throat. "I mean, if you're up to it. You might be busy or something..." And it did look like it. He didn't look a bit enthusiastic as she was. Fuuko wondered if he was sick again.

"Actually..." he lied. "I'm a bit preoccupied. I'm sorry Fuuko. Maybe some other time?" 

"Oh." Her face fell. "I see. Are you really that busy? Maybe I can help you..."

He shook his head and replied in his most polite voice, "No thank you. I'm really sorry. Perhaps we can see each other the next day? Or the following week?"

"Yeah, it might be better." She agreed. "Are you sure you're okay?"

He nodded reassuringly, though she doubted it. "Okay then. I'll see you around." There was an unmistakable look of disappointment in her face, and she had a hard time hiding it. "Bye." She attempted to smile and closed the door behind her. 

"Ja ne." Tokiya raised a palm. As soon as the door was shut, he exhaled out loud and walked over to the chair he was previously sitting on. A book lay open on the kitchen counter, but now he found no interest in reading the next few chapters. He settled himself down, in a more lenient position than a few minutes ago. He sighed.

He just lied to her. 

Lies were never new to him. He used them, whenever the need arose. However, it was never in his nature to tell a fib just for the sake of doing so. He wasn't so sure that his 'purpose' this time would justify what he just committed. 

It flew out of his mouth. His mind wasn't helping either. Again, he was kept awake last night trying to think of a solution to his problem. Fuuko. She was like a nightmare. She beleaguered him, overtook his senses, his thoughts and all of what was left of his practical side took cover when she was around him. Not that he didn't enjoy it. He somewhat did. She was a nightmare but at the same time, a dream. Her persona was what captured him. He was fascinated with the way she carried herself, how she acted, how she viewed life as a person...

So why'd you lie, then? His inner mind asked him.

Reality strikes again. His ridiculous fantasies were erased immediately. He wanted to avoid her. He spent all night, debating on how he would handle the situation and the verdict was so. It was hard and many times he was tempted to lift the phone and call her. However, his pride and common sense held him back. The phone lay untouched.

She still loved him. Raiha. He could see it in her eyes each time he spent with her. He wasn't a fool. He **knew** that deep in her heart, she would not ever let go of that memory. And he didn't want to complicate things by telling her that he had fallen for her charms. 

Besides, how would he tell her anyway without looking like a complete idiot? 

He shook his head. It was useless. Why try?

*******

"I don't get it Yanagi. I really don't." Fuuko mumbled, playing with her fingers quietly. It's been 3 weeks and he hasn't called or accepted a single invitation to go out with me. Is he mad at me or something? He usually agrees to going out or just a simple walk. I've tried going to him, sending an email and calling but nothing seems to work. Nowadays, he's simply too busy."

"3 weeks? I wonder what's wrong with Tokiya-kun then..." 

"You know, I don't have any idea on what he's busy on either! He doesn't tell me anything." 

Yanagi shook her head sympathetically, putting her hand on Fuuko's shoulder. "Maybe he just has problems to sort out and wants to be left alone. You know Tokiya-sempai."

"No. It's not like that." Fuuko insisted. "That morning when we had breakfast at that coffee shop, I made him promise not to keep things from me anymore. We made a promise to tell each other things, problems or whatnot. So I don't understand why he's not living up to that pact." 

"Maybe this calls for something else. Take it easy Fuuko. Why don't you go to his place and fix things?" her friend suggested calmly.

"You know what, maybe I will." Fuuko sighed, standing up and walking towards the door.

Though she meant well, that was clearly not the reaction Yanagi was expecting. "A..anou..Fuuko! Maybe now is not such a good time..." She stood up too and held her arm. "You're a bit upset at the moment. Take some time first, will you dear?"

"Why should I?" 

"Because if you continue doing things this way, you'll end up getting into trouble...knowing you and Recca; you both tend to act before thinking." 

She looked at Yanagi, confused. "Trouble? What do you mean? You're the one who told me to go to him right now. I'm sorry Yanagi, but this has gotten out of hand already. 3 weeks and the guy refuses to speak to me. There's something wrong and he doesn't want to spit it out. I'm going to make him do it, then. I'll see you later." She raised her hand as a sign of goodbye before grabbing her jacket and walking out of the house. 

"Aa...hai." Was all she heard from her longhaired friend.

She wasn't angry. She was merely irritated. 21 days and no budge from the guy. What was going on?! Fuuko blew the stray tendrils on her face. There was no doubt about the fact that he was avoiding her for some particular reason. She was going to find out about it and hopefully straighten things up a bit.

What worried her the most is that he might be mad at her. It sent her feelings of uncertainty. 

But then again, why would he be mad at her? He had no reason to be. She didn't do anything wrong to him. Everything was making her puzzled. It was confusing. The day at the park wasn't any different. In fact, she tried her best to ignore the troublesome memory of their shared moment. She never really knew the reason why he tried to kiss her. Well, she said to herself, you don't have to worry now. You're about to find the answers.

Yanagi's persistent words came back to her. _Tokiya might be attracted to you_.

Fuuko laughed it off. Yeah right. Words of flattery never worked for her, anyway. She never paid that much attention to her figure, her looks or how she carried herself physically. What good would it do? She had this philosophy on looks and substantial attributes. She came to believe that there would really come a day that people would see her for what she was and not for her body or expression. Still, vanity makes its presence known and there were times when she'd look at herself in front of the mirror and study the body kami-sama gave her.

She was satisfied with herself all in all. Her hair was a messy as it could be, but it was a wash and wear rule which carried on since she was 10 years old. Her figure was no problem, for she was naturally slim and gifted with ample curves. Her features would never hold a candle to Yanagi's but who would care? Raiha came to love her as Recca loved his hime so she had no problems whatsoever. 

In fact, it wasn't really rare for her to have an admirer or two. She would occasionally receive trinkets, chocolates, flowers and some of the usual signs or subtle hints high school boys would send. However, she was swept off by her own ninja and that sent her devotees to the pit of disappointment. She didn't care about them. She was happy with him. His affectionate words could match even the poetic phrases of Robert Browning himself. But that kind of happiness was short lived. After Raiha had gone, the usual flood of flowers came back. She didn't bask in her fairly small moments fame now. The blossoms lay rotten in her locker, covered with books and papers.

Now that she did think of it, she wasn't that ugly or invisible after all. There were people who noticed her and were attracted to her. 

But Tokiya Mikagami? 

Fuuko coughed. It just couldn't be. She would have had to have long russet tresses, soft brown eyes and gentle tones. That was Yanagi. She knew that the master of the hyomon ken never looked at any girl except those who resembled his late sister. Yanagi happened to be one of the rare few, but her heart already belonged to Fuuko's childhood friend. The mere thought of Tokiya smitten sent Fuuko laughing out loud, causing by standers and strangers to look at her.

She smiled and excused herself quietly. That was why it was impossible for him to fall for her. She knew his type. The soft spoken, tender souls were what caused him to be reminded of his angelic neechan. But not her. Definitely not her. She was the complete opposite of the definition of a woman. Tomboyish, loud and outspoken as she is, Fuuko knew that she would never, ever come close to becoming Yanagi or the rest of the girls she had seen in class. While ladies nowadays kept to shy and subtle hints, Fuuko would brush everything away and focus her attention on more significant matters. With Raiha gone, she had no guy to swoon over, no gifts to cherish and certainly no tingly feelings to relish.

She came upon his door and smartly knocked. She brushed away her current thoughts and reminded herself of her goal. She was there to seek answers and get him to confess what was troubling him. Also, she added firmly, she wouldn't leave until she got a decent response. 

The wooden door swung open to reveal Tokiya in a long shirt, sweatpants and running shoes. He was mildly surprised but the expression went back to its deadpan manner. "Hi. What are you doing here?" he inquired calmly.

Fuuko donned a smirk and raised her eyebrow. "I was wondering if you have time for a small chat, Tokiya. I hope you're not busy at the moment and even if you are, I won't entertain any excuses. I wish to talk to you about some things which have been bothering me."

"I'm going jogging at the park." He answered, indicating his outfit. 

"No you're not." She told in a matter-of-fact tone. "We're going to talk." 

He did not like the tone of her voice. Not one bit. "Fuuko," he began "why don't we do this---"

"Another time?" she finished, cutting him rudely. "Because for 3 weeks, that's all you've been saying." She retorted, brusquely. "Geez, can't you even make time for a friend? What has been keeping you so busy these times? I hope it isn't a girl, because I know you'd tell me. I won't even take the whole day. Just 15 minutes of your time. After that, you'd have the whole world to yourself."

"Fine then." He said, crossing his arms. "Talk."

"Aren't you even going to invite me in?" she asked disbelievingly. Normally, the polite boy would open the door, wide enough to let her inside his home. However...

"If you say that it will only take 15 minutes, I can afford to stand here by my doorway and listen to you." He replied. "So what is it?" he leaned against the side casually and looked at her expectantly. This was new. Suddenly she was headstrong and bossy. She was probably having a bad day, he noted. Still, he had not the time to talk to her --- nor the courage. 

She nearly glared at him. Her temper was rising. She was never good when it came to patience and perseverance. Fine. If he wanted to take it outside, it was no deal to her. "What's going on?" she asked, getting straight to the point. If he was only going to allow her 15 minutes, better make good use of it.

"What do you mean?"

"You know very well what I mean."

"No, I don't."

It was a good thing she remembered to count up to 3. It wasn't that Fuuko got used to blowing up in front of the smallest matters. It was just that he was making this more difficult than she thought. "Mikagami," she uttered through clenched teeth. "I want to know why in the world you've been acting this way. It's about time you gave me a good reason."

"Acting like what, Fuuko?"

"Damnit, you're not making this any easier." She exclaimed out loud. "What the hell is wrong with you?! You're acting this all out, I know it and I know that you KNOW what I'm talking about. Spit it out."

She was right. He was lying and pretending. How come it wasn't reaching her? He had lied countless times before in front of different people. Even his professors would believe him. Though he never explored the medium, he knew quite well that he would make the quite perfect actor. Yet the mere sight of Fuuko, not fooled, proved that he needed to brush up his skills. 

"Why are you avoiding me?" she asked in a gentler tone. 

It hit him. Hard. He removed his gaze from her and let his eyes drop to the floor. "I don't know what you're talking about." He replied. Coolly, but a sign of hesitation was present in his voice.

"Yes you do."

"No. I don't."

She placed her hand over his chest. "Look at me." She commanded in firm tones. He unwillingly did so, taking another plunge into the world he so wanted to escape. A world filled with her beauty and happiness. It nearly caused him to go insane and now, he was taking it again. Fuuko was like nicotine. A drug. He couldn't stop thinking of her. He wanted to get out and stop the madness. 

"Tokiya," she voiced out slowly. "Stop lying. I know you're avoiding me. Tell me why."   

She wasn't letting him off. But hell, he didn't want it anymore!

"Why?" he repeated. "Fuuko, it's not that I'm avoiding you..."

"Then what is it?!" her anger was back. "Tell me now. I can't understand why I'm being treated this way! If you're mad at me, then tell me the reason why, Tokiya. Am I paining you? Tell me now, because I can't stand it any longer..." she trailed off silently. She too, bowed her head and refused to speak until he did his share. Tokiya had his own misgivings, but he had to reply.

"I'm not mad at you." He spoke, finally. 

Her eyes flickered open. "Then what is it?" she pleaded.

"It's hard to explain, Kirisawa." 

"You can tell me. Remember? You promised to tell me anything that bothers you. We made that promise Tokiya. What's happening to it now?"

That promise. He did remember. That sign called a yukibiri, often labeled as an immature gesture, started their trust and friendship. He did it and agreed, sincerely. But this was so damn hard for him! How could he tell her that he was ridiculously falling for her charms without getting hurt in the process? Why was she being so hard headed about it?

"Of course I remember. But you do know that some things aren't to be disclosed to anyone..."

"And why is that?" she challenged him. "I wouldn't bother you as much Tokiya, but I've got this nagging feeling that I have something to do with it."

"This doesn't concern you." He replied shortly, his pale eyes flashing for a split second. 

Her eyes narrowed. "If it doesn't, then why am I being shoved aside like a useless piece of metal?"

"Kami-sama's sake, Fuuko, this isn't a game!" he snapped, losing his patience. "Like I said, it has nothing to do with you, okay? I need to be left alone, to think. I can't be with you all of the time. Heck, I need to be with myself and I don't need any interference. I've had enough inconveniences around me already, do you understand?" 

She stared at him, slowly taking in all of what he said. A short moment later, tears began to form in her eyes. "I see." She trembled. "So, I'm an inconvenience to you? I'm a bother to you? If that was it...then why didn't you tell me?" Tears flowed freely.

Tokiya stood shocked, at the sight before him and partly because of what just came out of his mouth. The irony of it all was almost enough to drive him mad. What he said wasn't true at all. No, she wasn't even paining him. **He** just caused her the pain. 

He made her cry.  

It broke his heart to see her so. He had to do something, instead of standing there like a heartless fool. No. That wasn't him anymore. He cared for her.

This time, he could stop himself.

Tokiya raised his hand and gradually brushed the drops of clear liquid away from her eyes and a swift movement of his thumb caught them falling off her cheek. However, she drew back quickly and rubbed the back of her palm over her face. "Don't touch me." She muttered, coldly. 

That was harsh, but he deserved it. 

"I'm sorry." He began. "I didn't mean that." 

"It sounded like you did. You're a terrible liar." Her voice came out louder and sounding harsher. "Your severe words were more than enough. I got the message. What was so hard about that, Mikagami?"

Not only did he cause her pain, but anger too.

"No Fuuko. Let me explain."

She laughed, indifferently. "Oh, now you want to explain? No thank you. Did you not hear me? That magnificent speech of yours already told me what I needed to know."

"It's not that. You've got it wrong."

"I don't need any interference. I've got enough inconveniences." She repeated his lines. "What does that say? It's simple really. You've never wanted me around you, am I correct? Gee, I get it. You just swept in to help me with my depression and now that I'm okay and everything, you want to resume becoming the ice block we all know. You know, there's really no need for you to explain. Reality bites, and I guess it's up to me to accept that fact."

"Fuuko...listen, please? You're not an hassle to me..."

"Then what was that I just heard, damnit?!"

"What you heard was the product of my stupidity." He replied, helplessly. "You've got to hear me out first because there's a big mistake..."

She stared at him defiantly. "Yeah, if there was any mistake committed here," her voice cracked one more time before she swallowed up what was left of her emotions and donned a stony expression. "it was getting to know you." 

He could only stare back, his eyes begging her to stay and forgive him. She didn't take heed of his request. If he hurt her with what he just said a while ago, then her final statement struck him painfully. With one last glare, she turned her back on him and hurried away. He was stuck with nothing but silence in the background and his small breaths.

Frustrated, he banged his head against the wall. It hurt like hell, but it was nothing compared to the ache in his heart now. What a fool he had been. And maybe Fuuko was right after all. It was a mistake. A big mistake for her to get to know the real him.

He sighed. "K'sou."

Was it right that he let her go? Tokiya bit his lip, as his clenched hands shook. Maybe it was better this way. This was what he wanted...right? To be free from her...from her eyes, her laughter, her smile? What was this he was feeling? Mixed emotions and regret? There was no hint of relief in his heart. Only sadness, only pain. 

**No. **Hard as it was, he shook out of his silent trance. It was the right thing. For both of them. 

_Are you sure?_

Yes.

_Then why are your eyes wet?_

*******

"Tokiya-sempai? You're joking...right? You can't do that!" 

"Yanagi, I have to. It's the best thing for me. I've got a lot of chances out there and if I do play my cards well, I'll be able to make a successful living."

"But what about..."

"I'm sorry about this. I'm going to start fixing things with my professor some time next week. Hopefully, I'll be cleared out by the end of the second term."

"...I see. Well, good luck to you Tokiya-sempai."

"Yanagi? Could you do me a favor before you hang up?"

"...hai. What is it?"

"Promise me you won't tell Fuuko. Not a single thing." 

It took Yanagi only 3 seconds to figure out what happened when Fuuko came rushing back to her arms. Her eyes misted as she held her sobbing friend. Her heart ached. She felt Fuuko's agony. Yanagi could do nothing but stroke the plum colored hair and pat her back soothingly. The last time she saw Fuuko in deep pain was when the horrible news of Raiha's death broke out. 

"He...he said I was a bother to...him..." Fuuko choked out.

Yanagi's eyes widened a bit. "What do you mean?"

"That's the reason why he was avoiding me...because he apparently doesn't enjoy my company." She said, her voice calming down. "And that's why I hate him." She finished before wiping her hand hastily over her eyes. "I hate him, Yanagi. He's nothing but an arrogant jerk. I should've known better than to go on with this foolish thing." 

"Now dear, I'm sure he didn't mean anything..."

"Yanagi, he practically said it all! I wasn't deaf. I heard every damn word he said." 

And she could say no more to console her distressed friend. Yanagi knew better than to object, so she kept her mouth closed as Fuuko proceeded to vent out her feelings. Now she knew what happened. That mysterious phone call from Tokiya...and now Fuuko was crying. She wasn't sure whether she was right in assuming that Tokiya was pretty much uncomfortable around Fuuko and the latter took it in the wrong way...but his decision was that of an idiot's. How could he do that in a time like this?

Playing matchmaker was harder than she thought it would be. 

As soon as Fuuko got hold of herself, she asked what she planned to do about the situation. Fuuko's cobalt blue eyes hardened and her mouth was set in such a firm line that Yanagi could barely see her lips. 

"Nothing." 

"What do you mean, nothing?" Yanagi asked in disbelief.

Fuuko merely shrugged. "It's not my problem anymore. Besides, what's the use?" 

Yanagi had tried to protest but at that point, Fuuko had already started to leave for the door. 

*******

A quick run-in at the campus every lunchtime. There was anything but happiness seen in their eyes. Tokiya Mikagami was noted to be colder than usual and more preoccupied with something. People were scared to approach him and not one of his admirers dared to tease him, after hearing that he snapped at one of them pretty harshly. He was hardly seen as he spent most of his time gathering papers and information from his professors and the library. 

She was concentrating on her studies, full blast. It did please her teachers that she was doing well in her subjects more than anyone else. However, Recca and her other friends were more than worried about her reaction. Word spread among the four about her big fight with Tokiya. She continued to ignore Yanagi's pleas to make up with the incoming college student. Fuuko remained firm on her verdict. 

Another 3 weeks passed by and there were no signs of relenting. No one knew what was to become of the two. 

And on one fateful day, just when autumn was about to end, Tokiya Mikagami had disappeared from the campus grounds. No one had any idea where he went. Some supposed he was sick, others thought he moved to another school. His teachers would not say anything about it except that their best student was gone and that he wouldn't return.

As for Fuuko, she couldn't care any less. 

"So, what's the game plan?" she asked cheerfully after they picked up Kaoru from his school. "Aren't we going out for dinner or something this afternoon?" 

"Yeah. Hime gets to choose tonight." Recca replied, holding his girlfriend's hand. Yanagi did choose where to go --- a simple seafood place where they could enjoy the quiet. Not much people their age preferred the place, but it was perfect enough. For two hours, it was talk city. The usual chatter. Fuuko simply chose to relax and listen to the bits and pieces of stories everyone had to share.

She was perfectly content until a familiar topic resurfaced. 

"Say, what happened to Mikagami? I haven't seen him this past few days..." Recca asked. 

Fuuko nearly coughed up her rice and toppings. 

"I don't know..." Domon answered, shaking his head. "I would have enjoyed seeing the old chap. He was always such a perfect target for teasing. Maybe he decided to go into hiding once more. Do you know anything about it, Fuuko? Did he mention any plans or something?"

She swallowed the contents of her mouth before replying curtly. "No. I have no idea on what he plans to do with his life, so don't ask me." And with that, she went back to her dinner leaving everyone much surprised at her reaction. Recca and Yanagi exchanged worried looks. 

"Well, I wanna know what Tokiya neesan is up to now." Kaoru chimed in. "I wanted to ask him to teach me a few stuff on my algebra project."

"Actually," Yanagi softly began, "he called me up before. He told me something..."

Everyone stopped talking and stared at her.    

"Well?" Recca prompted her. 

Yanagi looked hesitant before she continued. "He said that he'll be leaving for the US."

"What?" She blurted out in shock. "He's leaving?!" 

It was her turn to be stared at. Yanagi nodded sadly. "Hai, Fuuko-chan. I wasn't supposed to tell you anything...but I feel that the same thing would happen again."

She sat still, staring at Yanagi's concerned eyes. "When?" she managed to ask. 

"Tonight."


	8. I Need You

Isolation

**Disclaimer: I do not own Flame of Recca or any of the characters. I'm merely using them for my own pleasure. Please don't sue me. Thanks.**

**A/N: **Hello again people! Thanks for forgiving me...and my procrastination. Anyway, this is the last chapter. The ending and all, for my story. ^^;; Your patience and perseverance have finally paid off. Now if anyone's wondering what's going to happen next, I'll leave it to you whether you want to scroll down or hit the back button. [I'm hoping no one does the latter] Thank you for all the reviews and thanks a million to the reviewers! You guys help me improve my writing skills.

Also, special thanks to my friend, nixxie. She's helped me by tossing in ideas for this fic when I was suffering the dreaded WB [writer's block] Thanks a million, pal! And now, without further ado, chapter 8. Comments, criticisms and of course, reviews are very much appreciated. ^-^ 

Chapter 8: I Need You 

She remained in her place. The uncomfortable silence pursued. Domon shifted unceasingly beside her, not knowing what to say. Heck, she didn't know what to say. Mixed emotions ran through her mind. A flood of unknown feelings and she didn't know what to do. 

He was...leaving?

But America was halfway around the world! What was that idiot thinking of now?

...really now, did that matter so much?

Fuuko distractedly pushed her utensils away. And so what if he was leaving? **She didn't care**. Right? Then why was she trying so hard to ignore the queasy feeling inside her? She felt like barfing what her stomach was about to digest. It couldn't mean that she still felt something for her ex-friend, or whatever she called him now. 

"Fuuko? You okay?"

She nodded absentmindedly. Of course she was okay. Why wouldn't she be? It's just that Yanagi's sudden confession came out as such a surprise. Of all things...she didn't expect this to happen. What was this? A new plan to avoid her? He was probably sick and tired of Japan. Sick and tired of seeing her... Another escape for him. It was so easy for him to hide. 

The thought made her so distressed. 

_So you are disturbed. _

Am not. 

_Yes you are._

Quit that. I don't care.

_You're sad. You feel this squeezing pain in your chest._

So what? I was shocked.

_You're empty. Lonely._

...No. I'm fine.

_Admit it. _

What do you care?

_You want him back, don't you?_

No! He's a complete moron. I don't want to waste my time with him.

_HE made you feel happy. _

Raiha made me feel happy. Tokiya hurt my feelings.

_Face it. Raiha's dead. He can't do anything now. Tokiya made you smile, in spite of everything._

Until I heard everything.

_You're lonely. Again. You never wanted to feel that again right?_

...but I feel empty. I have to admit that.

_What do you want, then?_

I...want him back.

_Are you going to let him go, just like Raiha?_

No. I can't bear that. I can't.

I can't stand the thought of it.

I can't! 

She stood up abruptly, nearly upsetting her glass of water. She had to do something. Anything. She scrambled out of the table, heading for the door. The rest of the group gave her astonished faces, but she threw an apologetic look at Yanagi. "I'm sorry." She mumbled. "I have to take care of something first."

Yanagi's mouth fell open then smiled encouragingly. "Good luck."

"Thanks." Fuuko returned the smile and ran out of the door.

*******

He took one last look at his home. He'd been living there for 10 years, and now he was about to leave it. A place filled with so many memories. Tokiya closed his eyes and for once remembered her cheerful smile, her beautiful eyes and closed his door, locking it. In a few hours, he'd be seated in an airplane bound for the other side of the planet. Everything would be left behind.

That wistful face that captured him from the very beginning still remained in his mind. He sighed heavily and followed the driver, carrying his things to the cab. It was going to take him quite some time to forget about her. Just like Mifuyu's death. He estimated that it would take just as long.

Or maybe longer.

Why are you doing this? He asked himself.

Because he wanted to go away. To leave her alone. To let himself be. It was the best for the both of them. She wouldn't have to see his face, which she now hated. And she wouldn't haunt him anymore. In other words, both of them would be in perfect peace if this thing pushed through. Everything was ready. He set his affairs in order, got his recommendation letters from his professors and had his application filled up. Harvard was willing to accept his scholarship. 

If only he could bring himself to say goodbye to her. 

He really was intending to say his goodbyes. That was why he requested Yanagi to keep the thing confidential. But knowing her, she'd probably tell Fuuko tomorrow. Hopefully. There was no use hiding it anyway. She'll be bound to notice that he was leaving.

Did she? The past few times he'd encounter her in the school campus, she would have this determined look and she ignored him. He longed to go to her and apologize profusely, to beg her to forgive him. But his pride kept him back. She probably didn't want to speak to him anyway. It hurt him, to see her so cold and harsh. He had to admit that he missed her. He missed her smile, her voice, and her eyes...

Oh, stop it. He told himself. Getting all too sentimental would get him nowhere. 

As he sat in the cab, the sky's blue hues slowly blended into deep orange and red. The perfect sunset. He leaned against a propped elbow and watched the sun sink down to make way for the moon. He spent many afternoons watching nature's marvels. He wondered if the same scene would take place in the US. Were the sunsets the same? Were the people as courteous as the ones here?

Would I still see the same pair of eyes and the smiling mouth? 

"Where to, sir?" the taxi driver interrupted his thoughts. 

"To the airport, please." He responded politely. "But before that...there's this place I'd like to stop by..."

*******

She stopped and leaned over, trying to catch her breath. She stood before his door. Thankfully, no one she knew saw her run recklessly by the streets. And now, she was actually here. Again. The place still looked the same. She hadn't been here for a long time. 3 weeks was long. She was back. It took her a while for her to gather her courage to knock.

Was he mad at me?

Her sudden outburst, her cruel words were definitely a mistake. She didn't want him to go. Fuuko drew a deep breath and knocked smartly on the door. 

There was no answer.

Fuuko tried again.

Silence.

She was about to kick it open when she found out that it was unlocked. She entered the room.

Empty. 

Everything was gone, save for the basic furniture. But nothing was around. Not a trace of life. His coat, his jacket, his shoes were replaced by the empty space. She ran desperately to his room, only to find a bare bedstead. The picture frame of Mifuyu was gone. More so, the silver band she had given him on one of their special outings was not to be found anywhere. 

She was late.

Too late.

Where could he be? 

A tear rolled down her cheek. 

He's gone. It's all your fault. 

It was all her fault! Her foolish pride, her selfish thoughts...it all led to this. 

And there was nothing she could do now.

She could have done so much. She wasted time.

They could have been happy.

**We could have been together. **

She hung her head in despair and fled out. 

There was only one place she could go to now. Before, she had him. She could run to his place and pour out everything. Yanagi could only do so much...but she felt right at home with him. He listened patiently to all her problems; he gave her advice she'd never heard before. He made her smile, he made her laugh...he gave her the comfort she was longing for. 

**I was such a fool.**

Why did she only realize this now?

**You only miss the water when it's gone.**

Another one. She let him go. 

**Only a fool would make the same mistakes.**

Just like Raiha.

Fuuko didn't stop running until she reached her favorite swing by the same old hillside park. She wasn't crying...yet. She couldn't bring herself to cry now. Her heart was. A painful ache tore through her chest and she pushed herself furiously. Mad at herself, angry at him for leaving, and most of all, enraged at her own stupidity. She knew she wasn't worth anything anymore. She closed her eyes, feeling the hot prickling liquid trickling down. 

If only I hadn't said anything. 

If only I forgave you. 

If only I told you. 

As the swing took her up to higher momentum, she was able to catch a glimpse of the whole city. It was already dark and the metropolis was lighted with all sorts of colors. A pretty sight, to behold. If only she could share it with a special someone, this time. She shook her head sadly, inhaling mixed feelings of regret and misery. There goes another chance of happiness. She had ruined it all. 

"Way to go Fuu---"

A flash of silver caught her eye. 

She frowned and slowed down. Right down there was a cemetery. A graveyard. Unless her eyes were fooling her, there was a yellow cab. And getting out of it was a tall man, with long silver hair. 

Was that him?

She squinted, trying to get a proper look. **It was him.** The long locks of silver hair she longed to run her hands in. The tall lean figure that held her when she was troubled. No doubt that it was him. He was still here. Kami-sama granted her 5 more minutes, or so she hoped. 

Fuuko tore down the hill, running as fast as her legs would take her.

*******

Tokiya walked over to a particular tombstone. There he offered white roses, in mid bloom. It would be a long time before he would be able to do this again. Mifuyu Mikagami. A loving daughter and sister. "Neechan." He whispered, smiling sadly. "I'll be gone for awhile. But I'll be back to give you your favorite flowers. I'm sorry that I have to go, but it has to be done." 

He'd do anything to take that moment to hug his sister and cry for her advice. But he was used to being alone. He'd live most of his present life like that. 

He wanted to linger for another thirty minutes, but since the taxi driver was waiting for him, he allotted another 5 minutes to spend time there. After all, it would be very long before he did come back. He also wondered, if he intended to go back. And if he were to come back, would he go back to her? Would she still remember his face?

Would she still accept him?

Tokiya pictured Fuuko after another 6 years. Probably working, successfully. And with another. 

The image made him wince. If it was anything, he wanted to be the one to hold her. 

Damn, he hadn't even left the country and he missed her already! How was he supposed to live like this? 

He loved her. He loved everything about her. He loved her so much that it begun to hurt now. He wanted to hold her in his arms again, to continue that kiss he had begun. He longed to tell her that he loved her since the beginning of everything. He wanted to be with her. 

Unwilling to take this any longer, he stood up and said his final goodbye to his sister. If he was to forget everything, then the sooner he started, the better it would be. He turned around, and made his way to where the cab was waiting to take him to the airport. But he fixed the flowers once more. He couldn't help but do it. "The truth is..." he said to the tombstone, "I don't want to leave. But..." 

"But what?" A voice interrupted.

He stopped, nearly dropping the flowers. 

"Well?"

That voice.

He couldn't believe it. Tokiya spun around to find Fuuko staring at him expectantly, a bit out of breath. She was panting and the cold atmosphere made her breath visible to the eye. He opened his mouth a bit, surprised, shocked and yet relieved at the same time. **She was there.** Looking at him, waiting for him to answer. He couldn't speak. 

She took a few steps closer with her hand raised. And slapped him. 

He winced inwardly as her hand struck his face. An obvious red mark replaced the spot on his pale cheek. He regained his composure and stared at her blankly. At least he knew now that she knew about everything AND that she was angry with him.

"Liar!" She yelled at him. "Why didn't you tell me about it?"

"About what?"

"About everything!" 

At that moment, rain fell from the skies, at first gentle then stronger drops pursued. He closed his eyes for a moment feeling the cold wetness, before opening them again. "It was nothing, Fuuko. Think of it as nothing." He forced himself to lie, once more. He had to go. He couldn't stay here. It was much too hard now. His plane was due in 2 hours. 

"You should know that you're a terrible liar, Mikagami." She crossed her arms. "You idiot. I know about everything. Why didn't you tell me about it? You never even told me about how you felt!" 

"I'm telling you, it was a spur of the moment. It was a mistake, okay?" his voice, raising a few decibels higher. "Why do you insist on taking up this subject? It's a painful thing for both of us, so might I suggest that you go and that I leave now?" 

"Look, I know I was scared at first and I wasn't ready...but you should have told me! I wasn't blind, you know. Why didn't you tell me?" she insisted, her eyes flashing.

"Tell you what?" he asked.

"That you had feelings for me!"

He stopped for the second time. Taken aback. She knew. How? Why? He bit his inner cheek and remained quiet. Fine. He'd tell her and get it over and done with. It was clear that she wasn't allowing him to escape. Even if it was against his will. His mind told him to go, yet his heart begged him to stay. And confess everything.

He was going to clear his conscience once and for all.

"I was scared too." He spoke in calm but subdued tones. "Scared that you'd reject me. I knew you still loved Raiha and that I would look like a mere fool if I told you everything I felt." 

For a second, she almost smiled, but her face remained cold. "Idiot!" she said again. How many times did she have to say that? He knew he was an idiot, a complete moron. "You would never know unless you tried, right? You're nothing but a coward, Tokiya. Here you go. You're running away again, just like you did to us before. Is this your way of solving your problems? Like a selfish brat?!"

His patience was giving up already as his eyes began to narrow dangerously. But he kept his temper in check. If this was the last conversation they were going to have, then he had better make it good. "Fine then. I loved Fuuko Kirisawa ever since I came back from Europe and saw her. That's the reason why I wanted to help her because I couldn't bear the sad picture in my mind. I couldn't find any explanation for it. I tried to distract myself...but you know what?" he cupped her cheeks and looked straight into those pools of blue. "I found out that love has no explanation. It just happened, Fuuko. You just captured me. I didn't mean to fall for you, but it just happened and no matter what I'd do, you'd always be there inside my mind. I had no choice but to go so that it wouldn't continue."

All the time, her mouth has opened in a semi-circle, while red tinted her cheeks. His words had gotten to her, somehow. Tokiya sighed and reluctantly brought back his hands to his sides. "But I knew that nothing good would come out of it, since you still love the man who's probably watching us up there. I wouldn't want to betray your relationship or anything. Besides," he chuckled uninterestedly, "I'm already labeled as a pathetic loser...so what good will it do if I stay here?" 

He turned his back and headed over to the driver, who seemed to be watching the two, amused at the funny scene. 

She was still frozen in place. He said it. He loved her. Funny, how it felt...but somehow, she knew it all the time. It explained everything that happened. From the time when he was acting so strange to when he almost kissed her. And he held it all back because he was scared? All because he thought that Raiha was still her distinct lover? 

He didn't expect her to return his love.

But she wanted to. She knew she wanted to.

So what happens now? 

He was leaving. 

She couldn't let him.

"Wait!" she called out, running to him. 

He stopped in his place and faced her. 

"Don't leave." She told him, a touch of pleading present in her voice.

Once again, he sighed. "Give me a good reason, Kirisawa." His voice was icy. Her heart skipped a few beats in horror. Only the old Mikagami spoke like that. And if he was going to revert to that unbearable state once more...

"Because..." her voice quivered. She had to try. "Before you came back, I was so lonely. Everything about me was sad. Yet you managed to change everything. You were the least expected person to help me...but somehow you did succeed. And not only that," she took his hand and pressed it to her heart. "I gained someone special too. If you go now, all the pain would come back and everything would be empty. I know I've made terrible mistakes, and I'd be committing another one if I let you go. I don't want to feel that emptiness anymore." She squeezed his hand harder. "So please don't leave me. I'd be lost...and I need you to guide me."

Tokiya remained silent, staring at her, unable to speak. 

She had feelings for him?

Fuuko awaited his reaction. 

Nothing. 

Two drops of tears rolled down. "I love you Tokiya." She whispered. "Please don't go." 

He wanted to say something. He wanted to wipe those tears away. A horn honked and he knew that he'd be late if he delayed getting himself to the airport any longer. 

But those begging eyes. 

The ones he longed to see happy and filled with life. They were filled with tears now. He never wanted to see them like this. 

"Tokiya..." she looked at him despairingly. Then her face fell after a few seconds and she turned her back to go. "I'd better leave now...if you still have that plane to catch..." 

Wait. What was she doing? 

What am I doing? 

He grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him, wrapping his arms around her in a closed embrace. She held him back, not wanting to let go. Neither wanted to let go. She mumbled all sorts of apologies for calling him names, for mistaking everything... He closed his eyes, letting himself soak in the rain, while telling her that everything was going to be okay. 

And she looked at him, asking for reassurance, for she was scared. 

That's when he realized that he didn't want to be alone. He felt right at home, here in Japan. Here with her. Nothing would ever replace the warmth he felt, though rain fell and wet everything around them. What a fool he'd been. He was happy here. Holding her safe. She was content, protected, loved. She felt destined to be with him. 

**They belonged together.**

Both of them were afraid of keeping the distance. 

So he drew her closer.

And finally sealed it. 

~Owari

Started: January 29, 2002 – 8:06 am

Finished: May 28, 2002 – 9:56 am


End file.
